it goes on..

THIS BLOG HAS MOVED

2009-05-28T20:48:00.002+10:00

AS said before, this blog will be moved to my own domain.
Converting from blogger to wp format was a bitch, but its all done.

http://victor.xiongz.com
or
http://xiongz.com/blog

SEE YOU's THERE.

Live everyday like its your last =]

2009-05-19T21:19:00.003+10:00

It's been quite a shit week. Nothing's been happening.
I downloaded a shitload of series, and been watching them all week basically. 24, and The Simpsons. Simpsons are finally on HD now and widescreen. It looks damn awesome.

The assignment that I was stressing about, was handed in. I think I have been put down for minimum contribution. So.. fuck it!, and I will just try hard in my End of Semesters.

BSXC is going to be on this Thursday, but people are all revoking their tickets and selling it. So I guess I wont be going to that.

My dads gone to china, and I feel free in a way.

Yea, dull week. The weeks have become a routine now. I'm getting sick of it, and time is going too fast. Don't know if its good or bad. Its just work, uni and watching series or MSN. I cannot FUCKING believe 12 weeks have just gone by for uni. 3 weeks away from Mid Year Exams.

From what I have said in the last entry, I am really considering doing a trip to a new country, and starting new. I had a dnm with Nick a few days ago, and I've come to realise, I don't want life to go the set way. Theres the person, who finishes their uni degree, get a job in the office, get married, have kids, buy a house, and get old, and die. I don't know if when they get old, they will be happy with how they lived their lives. For me, personally, I think they would have wished they done more.
I want to live a life of experience, start from scratch in another country, and work my way up. Working my way up as in persistance, if I fail, I will try again, and again and again till I can live a life. Living on the street if I have to. Find a job, change jobs, live by myself, I dunno, everything that can give someone some real life experience.

Also "Live everyday like its your last".

I reckon I am saying this, because of many failures in my life. Maybe if I had made it into USNW LAW, or some high shit, I would also live that cliche'd life.

Anyway, something for me to think about.

VictorXiong.

Esc.

2009-05-12T12:20:00.002+10:00

Things have just been shit these few days.

Uni work..
Group assignments, just complete 0%, mother fuckers. For accounting have this viet guy, who is nerd, tries his hardest in all his subjects, studies, but I still get higher than him in the test. The thing is, he's in my group, and he call's me asking if I have started my part. I say, yea, I'll do it soon. Then he goes, yea, we all haven't started, but said that he tried starting it, and it was just too hard, and kept on leaving it. Okay, thats cool, thats stupid. He then goes to me, send me your part before 10 tomorrow, or I'll put you down as 0 contribution to the group assignment. Are you a fucking retard?, you haven't even started your part yourself, and you consider putting other people down for no contribution. Maybe if you were to act all leader like, you would've told me to start earlier, which I should have myself, but you don't put someone else down for 0 contribution when you go "I kept on leaving it because it was too hard". That pissed me off and I'm going to fucking go crazy if I get put down as a 0. Oh and its one of those weird viet guys. Same face as Jacky Chin, talks like him, acts like him, twitches, and just a fucking retard. That is what drives me nuts.
All other uni work has been pissing me off. I skipped economics last week, beacuse I didn't finish a marketing part. I am very behind in everything, and I don't even hope to pass some of the units. It's just so fucking stressful. My exams are in a little less than a month, and I know nothing. Economics, I missed all lectures since week 4, and don't GET jackshit, accounting, the NEW topics are just FUCKING crazy (failed my week11 quiz), BAS essay haven't started, and marketing, I have no IDEA whats going on. I'm totally breaking down. Either I have been procrastinating too much, or just being lazy, or maybe Uni is just not the thing for me.

For the past few days, I've been having deep thoughts of dropping out of uni, and continue working, and work through life of experience or something, not this uni shit. Uni really isn't the thing for me. I've had light talk to my parents about this situation, and they don't entirely agree, but my dad said if I come up with a business idea, or write a good business plan, he will be happy for me to leave uni. Anything is better than uni. Some nights I literally sit on the computer and bang my head against that table, pulling my hair out. I just dont FUCKING get it. I think I'm just a dropkick, too stupid for uni. It's wasting my time and wasting money.

Friends..
My personality is really shit. To be honest, my personality is weak. Even though I might be able to bash someone, or punch the shit out of someone, I just won't do it. I'm chicken?. On the party on Friday at Havana, Neon, nudged me on the shoulder. I pushed him back, and said fuck off dickhead. Well I've been hating Neon for the past.. what.. 3 years?. I pushed him again, then he goes, what you gonna do, I've got all my boys, outside, right here right now. What.. all those asian guys? I don't know, but I was pretty weak, I just walked off. For the past few days this incident just kept on making me think, what should I have done, should I have just punched him in the face, or what.. FUCK. SUCH a fucking tryhard. I guess, I wouldnt've punched him or anything, but whatever.
This blog is really getting personal, but it really makes me happier blogging it, instead of keeping it to myself.

Theres so many ppl that piss me off.
It might be just me, but I dunno.

There are just so many fucking retards in this world.

Work..
Work hasn't been great. It's getting repetitive as days go by. I'm getting so SICK of it. It's the same shit over and over again. It's just in and out, 8 hours go by. I don't know, I've lost all motivation. Work is just pointless now, apart from the fact of income.. lol , which is the whole point of work. I really just can't be fucked working. I lost family time, friends time, and most 'importantly' uni work time. I sometimes spend all shift thinking about uni work, and how I'm going to fail. Maybe it's time to look for a new job.
It seems I have problems with commitments. Oh well.

Richard told me his brother works @ Kirspy Kreme, and so he did. I saw him on Monday, and had a chat to him. Pretty random, but yea, he's just as cool as Richard. Lanky white guy, funny, and yea, "hey bro, come by and I'll hook you up with free donuts".

Anyway..
Another deep thought again, after this dropping out of uni shit, is just running the fuck away. Join the army. I really am considering it. It will fix up my personality, and might make me confident in life. But I didn't think too deeply. I was only thinking of going to another country, and starting a life out there. Going to the US, or England or something. I don't care, start bare minimum, no job, no place to live, but I want to experience my way up in life. That way, I will make the most of my life. I'd rather be sleeping in the gutter for a few months of my life, looking for a job, looking for income, and slowly building my way up. It may sound very stupid, but I am happy to do it. Though my parents would get weird about it.
Escape is my key world ESCAPE from everything.

Last week was pretty hectic. Assignments, work, and all that shit. Clubbing was alright , at Havana. Out side the club was preh weird. Gaybars, and guys holding hands, lesbians making out, trannies, and yea. Its Oxford Street.
Thursday was pretty random. I was late for uni that day, and randomly saw Frank at the train station. We ended up going to Parra nd chilled there for a while, because I already missed my tutorial when we got to Parra. Frank ended up jigging his Eco Tutorial too lol!. I also caught up with like Nickhuang/Revo/Jackiechan on friday.
But alot of things take my mind off things. But when I'm alone in the train, or just walking by myself somewhere, my head just goes crazy, thinking about this and that. It's really killing me.

ESCAPE!!

-Victor Xiong
p.s Shit long blog, but whatever. Soz.

2009-05-03T22:39:00.003+10:00

Saturday was quite random. Woke up in the morning.. and Nick called up after finishing his exam asking me to go to the city.
Well, I did call in sick from work, so I was like, meh, haven't had a weekend off for ages. So I went to the city.
Basically played pool, and walked around the city.
I'm starting to feel the physics of pool :D
I nearly did a runner, but only did 5 balls in a row, then screwed up. Pool ends up getting tiring.. and yea. phased out after like an hour. We ended up meeting with Seano/Jared and Revo nd randomly saw like Garmon/Leith nd shit too.

But last night, we killed like 9 hours?.. Had dinner out too, then Nick slept over..
It really takes our mind off things I guess, killing time and all that. But facing uni/reality, it's really quite shit.

Anyway I'm finding myself with a huge problem now. I buy a fuckload of scratchies and lottery tickets. I don't know why, but it is quite like gambling. It's becoming a problem. Yesterday I spent over 5 dollars on scratchies. The last few days, I bought the powerball jackpot tickets and random lotto things. Spent like 15-20 bux on this shit over the past week?.
ARGH.
But haha, the powerball jackpot, I ended up getting TWO numbers out of 6.
If only I had one more number, I would've gotten atleast 200 bux.
THAT JUST makes me want to buy more!!.
Which I am next week.
I'm becoming a douche...

NEED QUITLINE.

Oh yea, I went to allans music yesterday..
I AM totally craving a classical guitar now
I disliked it for a while, but just recently, classical guitar really seems to suit me. Looking to buy one soon, a cheap one.
Theres this iBanez one with a cutaway on it, which I am looking at.
GAHH waiting for the stupid stimulus package to arrive!!

Anyways, time to do this ACCOUNTING assignment!

victor xiong.
p.s This blog is moving to www.xiongz.com/blog soon. I still haven't quite worked out how these blog codes work yet. Maybe in another week, I'll find out.

2009-05-02T01:08:00.002+10:00

Woah, I haven't blogged for two weeks!

Just remembered about blogging...
I guess that's what uni work has been doing to me :(

Lifes actually been treating me alright lately.
Things are starting to get settled.., uni, work, leisure and everything.

My uni break was pretty shit though. I had work basically 4 days of the break, and the other two days, we had group work assignment meetings for marketing.., which ended up 1 hour and 3 hours playing snooker. Though, we did do quite alot of work. The other days, I just stayed at home bludging..., when I'm meant to get my business portfolio done, which I ended up starting on the last night. I literally stayed up to 5:20 AM, and my eyes were like sore as crazy. It was meant to be 3 months worth of work. Oh well.

Last Saturday was Alisons birthday party, which I forgot about. At work Sean calls me and tells me to go, and I was like fuck.., I didn't bring anything to wear. So that night I was just stuck in my work uniform. MEGA gay.. It was just clubbing I guess, and lots of drinking. I don't remember much..

I got my accounting results back that day too. I was pretty happy. Got 81/100, which is my second Distinction. Feeling pretty happy about it. I topped the Blacktown campus according to my teacher (that shows how dropkick Blacktown is). But in Parra campus, its different. Albert got 90/100 for Accounting, which I think was top of Parra. Wadda beast. High-Distinction!

These two weeks have been alright I guess. Things are quite balanced, apart from my uni work. I have an accounting group assignment due on Wednesday next week, but, I only have contact to 3 out of the 5 group members, because the other two.. don't turn up to tutorials?. A lebo guy and a blonde chick. Stressing like crazy about it. I don't know what to do, but argh, stupid group assignments. Though marketing is alright. We finished the poster, and all ready to present. Our presentation is in week 13 though. Lucky last :D

Oh yea, the past week I had the flu. Just having headaches/running noses/sore throats and all that. Feeling like shit. But at the moment, I'm feeling better. Still feeling a little weak though.

Anyway,
Just an update :D
g'nite!

2009-04-18T23:38:00.000+10:00

happy birthday garmon.

IM YOURS!!

2009-04-18T21:21:00.003+10:00

So it was the Jason Mraz concert on Wednesday night, which was amazingly exciting, and I've begun to like alot of his music. I went with Johnny, which we also thought.. GARMON would have went.
Garmon, I really feel bad going to the concert and you are seriously the only real Jason Mraz fan.. out of all of us, and I swear, even over the whole crowd. I'd say less than 30% are real Jason Mraz fans, and the other 70% are there just to listen to his hit "I'm Yours" or some other hit. And as you said, you know more of his music than both me and Johnny combined.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Anyway,
The week has been pretty awesome, just full of random shit, and shit amounts of sleep.
Had a mad party on Sunday, which I don't even remember, but without any sleep, and after sobering up, went straight to the easter show. And stayed till the fireworks.
I absolutely collapsed when I got home. It was fucken awesome though, never done anything as stupid as that.
On the night before, I shouted Frank nd Sean pure Cuban Cohiba cigars. They were the fattest shit, but it was one killer puff. It tasted so damn warm nd good. But washed it off later with a few ciggies. Damn cigars are strong. But they are the shit.. they were $39.95 each, but I got it discounted to $35.00 haha. Actually felt like a high roller, you know those guys, with like a glass of scotch, rings on their fingers, and playing poker, while smoking a fat Cuban Cigar.
AHAHA - imaginations.

So thats that.

Tuesday was just study I guess, and catching up work, which wasn't completed the days before. Wednesday was uni, then after uni I caught up with like Raymond and Nick, and we went shopping!! wtf. Anyway after we played pool, Johnny nd I caught the taxi to the Concert..

These few days are just work I guess, my boss knew I had a holiday, so yea, I have 4 shifts next week, and another 4 the week after.

The UNI breaks are absolutely bullshit.
That is all I have got to say.
ALL my assignments, and group posters or watever, are due the week after the break.
And even from any other uni, the break is just full of 'catchup' and 'assignment' work.
ARGH, I can see alot of work coming up.

GRR gotta organise.

BYEBLOG.

updation

2009-04-11T23:33:00.003+10:00

It has been a week, and to be honest, a semi-hectic week?

Tuesday, I spent all day at home studying for economics. Studied quite hard actually, and did some practice. Wednesday was the exam.

Wednesday, my dad had a business meeting in Blacktown, so YAY me and my friend got driven to uni, saved us the 1:30minute trip.
It was time for the economic exam (mid-semesters), which I was overly worried.
Walked out going fuck..., but still okay I guess. It was hard.
But I got my results back yesterday, and got 23/30.
Preh damn happy. Its a distinction for the moment , and its worth 30% of our whole economics sector.

So thats that.

Thursday, was the TSA day.
I woke up to a massive headache, but it started getting better later in the day.
Raymond nd shit came over and we got pimped up with gel nd shit before we left.
Had dinner at Menya, the day when I should've really bought the godzilla, because I really was hungry after I had my ramen.

So then we walked over to TSA.
The cruise was alright I guess. It wasn't much socialising, but it was just drinking for me, and a few friends I guess.
I spent $175 or so on the boat, just for drinks. It was like a drain.
But I shouted many people.

After the cruise, we basically walked around the city.
Randomly popped up at a sausage sizzle stand.. 1AM in the morning. We had our snacks, and moved on. We also had a vomiting friend.. Raymond, who vomited once on the boat, and 3 times off the boat.
Terrible
So thats that.
Basically all night was just random shit.
I went to space, which the chick to guy ratio was 5:50.
Leaved that place and went cityhunter to sleep. (Meaning I fell asleep on those comfy chairs, even though I paid for .. I forgot how many hours.)
Then at about 4AM, Bond drove us home.

I needed to sleep so bad.
Work was on, so yea, I didn't want to get fired.

Nickhuang tagged along and slept over. Which overly surprised my parents when they thought it was me on the sofa.
So after that we went lunch, and I went to work. (PISS TIRED).

Got home, and slept straight away.

Saturday, was basically work again, and just chilled out. I was going to go poker, but just relaxed instead. Roger came over in the morning, randomly..
Picked up the poker set to go Kevin Bai's house
I was really amazed at Ware's BMW. He drove by and drove us to Hurstville.
Preh sexy fking piece of shit.
Then Matt drove me to the airport... from Hurstville when I saw him.
Random day lol.

Anyway,
Been a hectic few days,
More to come

Peace out

Sick

2009-04-06T13:29:00.000+10:00

Well, I am now sick!
Feel like shit, and yea, taking medicine!

Economics exam coming up on Wednesday!
Don't know how I am going to cope.
Study study study.

Although, I made a trip to the bank today, and applied for a credit card.
Something that was on my list when I turned 18.
And after a vigorous half an hour of waiting, verifying, I was approved for $1K.
Now, the wait for the card to arrive :D
So that made my day pretty happy.

Anyway, I am off to study now.

BYE BLOG

Mega

2009-04-05T11:08:00.000+10:00

Woah.

I had a long talk with Priss last night, and found out some VERY weird things.. which is mega coincidental. WE were like.. HOLY fking shit.

So yea, she went to MLC and I went to Newington for primary school. I just found out she went to MLC. And so I was like.. so since primary school?
Newington and MLC had a dance or a 'social' in year 6, where they had a circle and we had to dance with everyone, and do different dances, and basically got to know everyone sorta thing. How weird. So yea, we HAVE somehow danced before, and we have SOMEHOW seen each other before LOL. It was like.. holy shiet.. woah.. this is scary haha.
I've know her for about a year now, but it may have been longer! haha
We showed our year 6 pics. It was so roflmao.

Anyway, some people might not find that amazing, but its jaw-dropping for me. I'm just gonna WTF for a bit now.
It's like one of those long lost friend sort of thing. Or a friend that we never knew.

So anyway, OFF TO WORK now.
Fuck.

Victorday

2009-04-04T20:46:00.000+11:00

=D
I am finally 18!
A big step up in life.

Today was my mid - semester accounting exam. I might be over-reacting, but I have never felt that good about an exam for ages. Did every question, understood everything, and the fact that I wrote notes, highlighted and re-read it over and over again :D, I walked out the exam room jumping for joy.
I guess Kenny was right!, good lux on b'day :D

So today, was my 18th. I really didn't have much to do. My exam finished at 4:30 PM, and my dad drove me home from that shithole. Got home at like 5:50. We went Sizzler. Man that shit is filling. So yea, that is basically my day :D
I got a few messages and facebook happy b'days, which also made my day happy :D.

I am hoping to do some things soon. Maybe casino, clubbing, pokering, and etc.

AHH finally 18 =D

Anyway,

I will finish my awesome day off with a nice sleep now.
LAME>

Bye.

WednesThursday..

2009-04-02T22:32:00.000+11:00

Wow, there's a new pattern of blogs every two days!

Hope to follow that soon.

Nothing has been happening these two days.

Yesterday was just a whole day at home. I wanted to leave for the library, but I didn't end up leaving home at all. I had 4 glasses of Tea, and couldn't sleep until 5AM this morning. And I had uni @ 12, meaning I had to leave home at 9:30. Felt terrible!. Note to self: Never drink tea at night.

So yea, exams are coming up on Saturday. But I can't help but think about my 18th birthday too! And I finally caught up with Kenny last night, we promised we'd catch up very soon =]. He also said that if I had an exam on my birthday, that means I'm going to pwn it :D.
Ahh, all these superstitions.

It is extremely stressful though. This is actually quite major, the 'Mid Semester' exams. Oh well, I am going to do some study now.

- Victor Xiong

*EDIT*
I will be moving blogs soon.
I'm setting up a blog code on my own domain www.xiongz.com
Figured it'd be such a waste of domain.

And If only I could move this blog over haha
I shall find some way

I had a dream..

2009-03-31T21:57:00.001+11:00

... that I wish I never woke up from.

Last night I had an awesome dream. Probably won't type it on here though.
But I woke up and I was like... woah...
It was about money by the way, nothing kinky, if thats what anyones thinking.

So yea, thats that.
Today was pretty random. I haven't played the piano since my last HSC. So say, 6 months?. It felt so weird, and honestly my piano playing is all deteriorating. I feel so sad about this now, but I think I should get back to it.

Yesterday, I tried my hardest studying.. or maybe not my hardest, but tried to. Didn't go very well, as I ended up watching a movie, and just slept. My timetable isn't working very well after all.

I will gradually get into it though.
I have my test this Saturday. Odd day isn't it. A good day for my 18th birthday too.

Today, I went to the city, and supposedly studying, but yea, we played a bit of pool, and checked out a few party venues.

After that, caught the train home with Sean, and basically chilled at the station food court for like an hour. Tired as... lol
I went to the library after, and went for 55 minutes, before the lady starts screaming "LIBRARY IS CLOSING, PLEASE LEAVE".

Not very good.
I will get to study now.

G'NITE

Shrillax.

2009-03-30T00:03:00.000+11:00

Well, nothing has been happening.

Friday, was just a chillout day, watched some movies, and nothing really.
Saturday, woke up and worked!. Then went to sleep after I got home. What a day eh.

Although, that night, I have made something really interesting to myself. Its the '100 things to do before I die' list, and I plan to accomplish all of these. The list includes things like, "Go to Europe, Start a new business, Own a Hendrix Monterey Guitar, Bungee Jumping", and like 95 others. Once I have achieved this list, from what I gather, I will have made the most of my life. And yes, this list is all realistic, not the shit ones you see "get rich, be famous" sort of lists.

I also made a timetable for myself. A personal and weekly timetable, which really puts in everything. This is my first step of being organised and succeeding and overcoming laziness. I'll upload a picture along with this blog.

---
Also recently, I've been having deep thoughts about my personality. I really don't know what I am, and what I seem to other people. I see myself as quite a different and strange sort of person. But ahh, I will pinpoint this someday, and blog it. It does quite bug me sometimes.

Anyway, today, was just normal, had work again, and got offered sushi again by Tom's mum. Man next time, when I do get hungry, or if I don't have money, I'll go get something there, like chicken or something.

Lastly,
I recently been having a hard time deciding on what cruise to attend to next week.
Theres the BSoc Cruise, and the TSA Cruise.
The BSoc cruise, is mainly people I know that go there. Like the group, but then theres people like N.S, K.C, and etc, many to name.
I'd see my time getting ruined, but the cruise with alot of friends seem alright.
But then theres TSA, which again, has quite a few people I know. The cruise seems so much better, in terms of the boat and shit. The pictures of this boat just makes my jaw drop.
The "Starship" pontoon is what its called.
The boat is also Taiwanese, which I don't fit in, but I love their people (girls) I mean.
But argh, I don't know what to pick.
It's quite hard to choose.
I'm really worried if I go BSoc, something will happen, especially when there's going to be alcohol involved.
And I've been having weird imaginations, of bringing a knife and putting it in my shoes, or a hidden pocket, and if anything happens, yea.., lets not get there.
I'm scared I will turn into one of those Hanning peoples, that will just snap one day.
I can really type the truth here, this shit has been building up in my head, and theres still room to build, but it WILL snap one day.
I can feel it.

But anyway,
Blogs over!
I'm happy! again.
Nah, things are fine just the way it is.

Anyway,

I'm off to sleep.. late again.

Good'night!

fuck you..

2009-03-26T22:11:00.000+11:00

So I realised, it's been two weeks since I last blogged.

These two weeks haven't really been great, but I'm guessing it's just pressure being built up from university, and some friends haven't been really great, when I was at Sean's party.

So, first things first.
I have realised, that I need to catch up with alot of people from high school. People who I use to talk to heaps, but recently haven't because we aren't in high school anymore. I talked to Raymond a few days ago, and it was cool, so we're deciding to go for a game of pool and some coffee. So, I have made a resolution to go through a list of people, and maybe catchup with them soon. It just feels great, because it won't feel like high school was the only place we were friends, and also, keep in touch for longer.

Second.
I am trying to type formally, for a reason I don't know.

Third.
Last week was pretty standard. Time feels like its going extremely fast now. I have thought about this so many times, and it's crazy. Especially having two days of university a week, and two days of work a week, the other 3 days are spent catching up homework. Our teacher was like, "Okay, it's week 5!, we have a quiz today!". I thought, week 5, wow, you got to be kidding me... But, actually, I have settled into university very well, and things are working out great. I got 100% for that quiz that we got too, but sadly, it's only worth 2.5% of our whole semester. The test was also bull-shit, it was 4 questions, of addition. Oh well, it's a good start.
Time has really been bugging me lately, and I can see, university will be very fast. Easter is also coming up soon, and we'll have our week's break. Fast eh..

Fourth.
Sean's birthday party. It was something I had been looking forward to for a while, as I haven't had time to really let myself off for a while, and party, or just hang out with a big group of friends. That day was an awesome day. In the morning, I met up with Frank, and we went to the City, to buy Sean the gift, which was a brand new Bass Guitar set. Sean kept on calling me, asking me to help set up his last minute party, but dodged it so many times, that he started getting irritated and pissed at me. But, I still didn't end up going to help him.
Moving on, Frank and I went home, and we tagged the guitar, whilst signing a card. Then after, decided to play a game of pool, and purposely go to Sean's party late, so we can surprise him with his Bass Guitar. Straight after I gave him the guitar, Frank handed me a bottle of Smirnoff, and I went straight to it, and skulled what was left in the bottle. I should never have done that, but I did, and couldn't help it. My head started spinning, and damn I felt so good. I had a few gulps of Vodka too, from some other guy.
That night, many people chipped in for Sean's gift, and signed the card, and was all going fine. Though, I was a little tipsy, things started going wrong in my head. I started getting angry. Firstly, I did not want to hear a *guy* next to him, go "Fuck it man, don't chip in", when I asked Frank Wang, if he wanted to chip. Now, I don't know who the fuck you think you are, but the money is not for me, and what?, your not getting the money?, or are you just a little FUCKED UP in the head?. He was also smoking that night, which I least expected from. But mate, I don't know what's your problem, fuck wit. Maybe if I was homeless, or if I was begging, then say that. I know your life is full of 'fuck it man, fuck this, argh fuck that', but not to me.
I got really angry that night, even though it might have been something little. What also pissed me off even more was smoking, he was like *puff puff*, and gives that stare. I have no idea what image you are trying to portray, but no one looks up to you, should try harder next time.
Anyway, the gift.
It actually costed me quite a bit, but I was surprised at the amount of chippers. I only have about $130 left to pay off now.
I was also talking to Priss, or Iris or something, when they asked if I had any food. I actually wasn't feeling hungry at all, and all day too. I actually had the flu that night. So I was like, nah, I actually hadn't had anything that whole day, no brekkie, no lunch, no dinner. Half a picnic bar was what I had. So thats that. *he* walks past, and goes, "something to be fucking proud of?, huh?". I turned around, and I was like.. ?.. I dunno if I should have been cut. Maybe.. It was because I was holding a Smirnoff bottle, which I just had. But later that night, he also paid me back the formal after party money, so I was cool about it, and chipped $5.00 in, as in all he had ($40.00 note). He wasn't very happy though. Clearly remember him saying, here, take the fucking money. But now that I have my money back, I actually hope to never associate with him again. He hasn't been the ideal person for me to ever talk to, since the whole of high school. He'd act cool one moment, but one moment he'd be all 'hey your a loser' sort of thing, and give me these stares. I don't know. It's just really dick to me sometimes. He had a fucking flick knife on him that night too. Now would I have said "something to be fucking proud of?". Argh, so many people that night, I'd say 5-6 people, I really had the shits with, in my head.
We went karaoke that night too, which was alright. I had a headache for the rest of the night, and the last thing I needed was people singing and loud bass ringing in my ears.
Some people just really pissed me off that night. I don't know what it was, but it actually was stuck in my head for the whole week. I won't be naming names on the blog, but argh, it's been terrible.
Overall the party was great.

My shift started 5:00AM the next morning, but I was still at George Street McDonalds at 5:40. I got home, showered, and went straight to work. And as soon as I got there, my boss was standing in front of me. I arrived at 8:20AM. But after a long scream he had, I was on my last warning, and will get fired?. I really don't know what'd happen if I did it again.
Work is cool now, theres actually someone I know at the airport now. Tom Lee's mum!. We often have a little wave at each other when I pass the sushi stand. She'd offer me free sushi, but I'm always like, nah, it's okay. Firstly, I'm allergic to seafood, and secondly, it's not nice to ask/take food.
My second day of work was quite hectic. I got off my '400' bus which dropped me off at T3, where I heard loud sirens, and saw ambulances and federal police cars and vans racing across the road opposite where I was standing. I stood still and thought it might have been a terrorist attack. So then I start walking towards my terminal, T2, which was just 50 meters down the road. While I was walking, three policemen come storming out of the Virgin HUB exit, with their hands on their guns, ready to shoot, and running like crazy, towards T3. When I actually got to work, I picked up my talky, and heard security screaming "Need guards here now, NEED GUARDS!"
I really wanted to go check it out, even though I was 3 minutes off my sign in time. I didn't end up going.
The talk then started, about the shit, and I was relieved it wasn't a terrorist attack.
It was just a huge brawl/fight.

But as I got home, it showed on the news, a man was murdered.
Damn that was weird, hearing shit like that.
I have really come to realise, airport security is really useless, apart from screening people and finding 'shit' in peoples bags.
I reckon they could've stopped these mofos who smashed that guy and killed him, but was just too scared to. Truthfully, they're all fat-shits, and about another 70% of them are Indians (not in an offensive way).
Though, security aren't allowed to carry guns or any form of weaponry, which I find extremely stupid. I know these people have rifles and pistols, stored in an emergency safe, in the basement, but I think they take this out for.. terrorist attacks?
But anyway, it was one weird day at work. Lol.

Fifthly.
This week was quite a high pressure week, and not to sound like a girl, I have broke down a bit. Firstly thinking of some friends thing, and stuff, alot of hatred built up. It's good no one reads this blog, except for Garmon. It's funny, how we don't even talk that often or much, but through our blogs, we really know what's up. But the thing is, blogging shit like this really makes me feel better.
One afternoon, I was really just sitting there, looking blankly at the computer screen, and things just went spinning in my brain. I cried a bit?, or not really, but like, it was just that feeling. It was the sort of feeling that I'd imagine myself jumping off a cliff, or just punching the shit out of everyones faces.
Anyway, this week, thoughts, and assignments have been the real killers.
Monday/Tuesday, we had an assignment due, which was a "Summary/Evaluation" business report. Okay, I got that over with. It was due 12 noon, at any campus. So my dad drove me to Parramata Campus, as he had a Business meeting with someone there. I got there, and bang, there was a 50-60 meter line, coming out of the hand-in reception. I innocently lined up at the very back, till I saw Femo. HOW RANDOM. He was actually 10 people away from the hand-in place, so I ran to him, and lol!, 5 minutes, the whole thing was done, and handed in.
My dad gave Frank a lift back to Hurstville, and we caught up a bit on the car. We both do exactly the same classes, and courses, which was good to hear. We could exchange some homework :D. He's also wanting to transfer out of UWS soon. We're all really in the same boat here. I can't wait till I transfer out of UWS, and go to an actual university, which is good. That kept me thinking for a while.
My dad hardly even recognised him. He knew him since year 4, and our parents back then were actually close?, or like talked heaps. He also smelt like smoke, which kind of got my dad sus.
Femo changed alot since year 4. James An was cool, and he use to fully participate in class, and was into this whole 'OC class' or 'Selective' school shit. Well, we 'all' were, and we all tried hard, but wow, it's interesting, how we really just didn't get into the best university our parents expected.

Accouting (Wednesday), the night before, I was really pulling my hair out! We had a progress report due the next day, and we had NO idea what to do. But managed to get that over with. I did the homework too, on the train, when I copied in all the answers from my friends.

Then marketing Portfolio was due, which was 5 week's worth of assignments and reports, which goes to the portfolio. Did that today, in 4 hours break.
But now, this week's university is over, I feel so damn relaxed. I jump for joy at times like this.
Oh, and this morning, I'm not sure what I saw at Ashfield, as my train was passing the station, but the whole station was closed, and there were ambulance crew and police crew there. There was a body lying on the ground, with a white blanket put over him/her, full body. It sent a slight chill down my spine, but, damn.., what happened?

Anyway, I finished this week off, with a game of pool with my university friend, who miraculously knows Matt Day too. We called Day for a game of pool, and caught up. It was quite strange, how small this world is, but it's cool. And now, I'm home, and wow I feel very good.

I don't want to be that little bitchy guy who always writes random shit on blogs, and bitch about life, but this really makes me feel better.

Quite a long blog this is.

I'm off.

Victor Xiong

bloga

2009-03-13T21:15:00.000+11:00

so.. its been a stressful week
ive been having a twitching right eye, like under it.. and twitching like crazy..
to the extent my image starts twitching too
its so bad..
and i read online, it says i havent had enough sleep/ and stressed.
i guess its from uni.
preh crazy, the amount of work and coping
i feel so behind now, like .. i dont know where to start again to pick up everything.

anyway last week was cool
friday.. went to the city with jared.. and went record shopping again..
i bought heaps of cd's again.. hahaha

saturday.. frank came back from canbera!
so yea, he called me early int he morning.. and hes like lets go city or something
i had work in the morning from 5-1..
so after work i went straight to the city.. and chilled
sean was there too
we played a few games of pool, got dinner
and met a few of franks ANU friends..
which are from sydney anyway hahaha
then went to the mardi gras..
it was extremely random, first year ive been haha
gay police men, gay ambos, gay everything hahaha
and man so many drunk people at hyde park

the hype of it is really good
helicopters, loud msuic, flashing lights, dancing
yea it was all cool
but had to go home early.. because of work the next day hahaha
oh well, it was cool catching up with frank
it had been like 3 weeks lol.

monday.. was my last business lesson with the uni, because the 'lectures' only go for 3 weeks
so no more mondays :D
haha
now i only got two days of uni a week.

tuesday.. studied heaps

wednesday.. finished uni and went to play pool with friends
and went home atlike 7... and started the marketing essay due the next day
GG

thursday.. uni again.... boring..

and friday:D
was just boring too
at home.. doing nothing
went city in the arvo chilled out.

man i want to soo do something soon.. lifes been so boring.

seanos party is next thursday.. and im like... fuckkkkkkkkkkk,, i have uni till 8, and i get there at like 10..
the party goes till 11
!! :(
gayest shit
and ppl arent gonna drink
haha
because most have uni lectures on friday morning......
oh well.

anyway, thats a weeks summarised

out.

2009-03-05T23:33:00.000+11:00

so not much been happening
coping well with uni i guess
tuesday,. had a whole day to do the homework, but left it till like 9 at night
and slept at 1 am LOL!
so yea, homework due wedensday morning at 9am.
so thats that, then wednesday was just.. bludgy
then i hard a marketing essay due for thursday..
started at night again!, and slept at 2am.
handed it in thursday morning.
thursday was preh cool, because i finish at 8 on thursday.. it was preh dark, and quakers hill is really fuckered at night..
so i got driven to strathfield station!.. and LOL, strathfield is like 40 minutes away by driving.
i was like.. holy shit..................
then after i caught the train to central.

guess what happens.
well judging by what happened 3 days ago.

anyway, get to central station
EXACT same spot
peter cook pops up.
i mean, what the fuck?
i didnt say hi or anything, but stared at him.. just incase the same thing happened.
and it was really him!!
dude, these coincidences scare me

so yea, caught up with him

haha when i saw him i was like
fuck should i say hi or not.. it might not be him again

but yea, preh funny.. he admits that they both cop a bit of shit, looking exactly the same.

anyway, sleepy
gnite

lol double post

2009-03-03T00:46:00.000+11:00

man just read through the old shit
i thought that maybe 6 months ago wouldn't be so long, and if i read it, it wouldn't really mean anything.., but wow, June last year till now involved some preh crazy shit..
graduation made me emo again.. a bit lol,
the hsc.. wow fuck things have changed..
i was soo fucken worried about the aftermath of the hsc and results,
but now im happy as ever, well not really, but wow, i pulled through last year!
the formal.. wow, that reminded me of random shit..
the bonfire?.. what the fuck lol, i can't blv that happened to me, feels completely odd

but yea, reading this shit, made me realise how much shit i've copped and been through..
and the random fights with koreans. haha (not racist).

anyway, got a new template.. looking sexy i hope.

OUT again

2009-03-02T20:59:00.000+11:00

and so, its been another 2 weeks since i last blogged and alot has happened.

today, was just fucked, and made me feel shit for the rest of the day. at central there was this guy that looked EXACTLY like peter cookie.
and i was like, hey peter, peter!!, and he looks at me, peter?,

i'm not peter sorry.

then he was like, peter, yea, peter goes to my uni, cook o'neil right?
and i was like.. what the fuck, thats coincidental.., theres a guy that looks like peter, but isnt, but knows the other peter, which i thought was him. but man, it was awkward haha, and amazing, in terms ofcoincidence.

haha it was one of those situations where u'd want to bang ur head onto the wall.. or jump on the traintracks or something

haha.

so yea, thats today..
today, was just uni i guess, lecture, and home. short day.
spent all morning watching that tropfest DVD i got from the smh

on saturday.
preh good films.

unis alright now, theres someone that catches a train with me now, ALL the way to hurstvile, and he lives in engadine.. LOL, so i'm not the only one that lives that far.
depressing.. the ride is like 2 hours.
we're both like motivated by the fact of how far the place is, and that we will transfer out of this shithole.

anyway, the past few weeks have been quite interesting..
orientation day at uni..
it was preh random, like .. it was far, but okay, got there, there was a street, with like 2 shops open and the rest smashed, and graffittied.
and ppl in the uni are like
haha u made it alive!
and iw aslike fuck you

lol,.. i might be over exxagerating but yea, its just as bad..
there were emus running across the soccer field..

and omg, during orientation, we had an indian lady..
ok, she had an accent, lol.
so the lebo guy picks up the fone in the library and starts talking.
yalla bro, just blah blah blah.
the indian lady, starts going,
ok, firstly you shouldn't have your phone on, and secondly you shouldnt be talking so loud..

the lebo guy starts imitating her indian accent from start to end.

and i was like
oh my effing god..
its the first day, and its orientation day.

that just shows what some of the ppl are like in the uni
but at the moment, things are going kool, meeting alot of new ppl,, and an asian chick, who seems to be the only one , out of 100, and like 2 asians out of 100 people.
preh funny

nothing much else happened, uni just basically started, and we're straight into it i guess
coping alright with everything

went to one of my dads conferences a week ago, free food i guess, for the day.

and omg.. i'm going through a phase now, which i don't particularly like..
which is buying cd's, and collectable vinyls.
on friday, i went with jared to the city, and wtf, went jbhifi and bought a FUCKload of cd's
i bought john mayer cd's, jason mraz, michael jackson, daft punk,
and all originals.
i bought this collectable vinyl of daft punk, the 'discovery' album. oh my god, its so good.
i ordered a michael jackson thriller 25 anniversary vinyl, which is 'rare'. it has his face and signature on the vinyl, and its playable with the original music, but the guys were like, u shouldn't play it, it'll scratch off everything
im guessing if michael jackson dies, in a few years or decades time, the vinyl will be worth a fuckload.

anyway, im inclined to buying cd's now, instead of downloading..
i dont realy know why.., maybe its because i have money now, or that i just relaly support the artist haha.

jason mraz is coming to town!
awesome!
and so i log onto the website and find out how to get tickets
and wow, i end up in playbilvenues.com, which dang, was a supporter/buyer of that shitty bonfire i had a few months ago.
so i call him up,
"so how many tickets you want"
and i was like what the fuck?
how much..
"free"

so yea, preh feeeking awesome
so johnny trans prolly going , and garmon (who supports the artist, is paying full fee! good on ya (y)). and garmon and his friends are all going.
i think we're gonna be seated with them..
dunno.

anyway, that was one longass blog..

goingto do some uni homework...........
really.

woah a month since last blog

2009-02-16T13:17:00.000+11:00

totally forgot about this thing

now im back to it.

recap..
first thing
enrolled into uws blacktown
realsed how fucken far it was..
like i thought it was just blacktown, but then its "quakers hill/schofields"
like wtf!!
thats not blacktown at all
last time i went parra to the guitar place, that took 1 hr and 40 minutes.. and i was going crazy..
now that i think, uws, daily, and its parra + 5 stops
jeeeeeeesus.. im gonna die
but LOL, it is motivational, i will try my hardest to get myself out of that fuken shithole
and i cant blv it, the O'week' for uws, is a week, 10am - 4pm, and like.. u do a day of random shit and u go home..
uts have camp
unsw have social games/activities
and luckiest of all .. frank miao at national uni
dorm parties/social events/and a whole week of games/fun/activities
uws really is a shithole , and now i do regret things..
oh well.

second thing
yesterday was my last day of work which requires fulltime.., and i cant blv it.. from after my last exam of the HSc, my boss calls me on that exact day and asks me to go work..
and then literally did fulltime all the way through to now, and now, uni starts..
i missed so much shit during that time :(
oh well
its a relief now its over
i only have to do 9hrs minimum a week now
beautyyyyyyy.

third thing
went poool soo much these past 2 weeks..
went 4 days in a row, then like 3-4 times after that over 2 weeks..
like omg.. ahaha.. i came off work early just to play lol!
addictive much..
and its all bcz of frank
so anyway, one night, after pool, we went home.. and walked past the country train station.. and saw a train to melbourne
and we're like
WTF LOL.
so yea, after that, next day, we bought tickets and decided to go to melbourne.
random mcuh?
the strathfield line was closed, so we detoured to a longer route..
then when we got to hurstville/penshurst.. and the driver speaks throught he PA
"Sorry about the delay, there was a log on he tracks ahead of us"
and yea, they spent like 20 minutes removing it..
like wtf..
how does a log just turn up on the tracks like that..
so that delayed even more..
then we got to albury..
the train stops and terminates,
"sorry bushfires ahead"
so we caught a bus
throguh the bushfire
and into melbourne..
and yea, a big delay too lol

pretty random..

so we got there.. relaxed..
slept?
anyway, went melbourne jail/parliamen/skytower/skydeck or watever u call it, / karaoke/daytona machines/dfoshopping/ and lol randomest shit. most of the shit we do in sydney.. like daytona and K.

but yea, overall a really kool trip
lots of gold shit happened.. funny asss

so thats that

anyway
thats a rough blog
hah

will be blogging more often again
if i remember this thingy

dullness

2009-01-23T23:40:00.000+11:00

well dull indeed.

ive been getting preh emo lately, with friends nd shit
i just dont see them anymore..
and i feel like ive been living at the airport.. and doing the same old shit day by day..
argh.. dull indeed.

motto.. eat sleep and work
fuck..
and whats made me even more emo is people on facebook going

UNSW!!!

comm law USYD!!
and like fuck?

everyones got something good
i feel outcasted, but i deserved it.

ahh i dunno, things just feel different now.

going to uws really feels pointless for me at the moment.
i dunno if im even gonna try..

--

well the last few days have been preh good
my usual monday and tuesdays off weekly

monday.. hung out with frank
haha just came back from japan/china
went allans music/guitar stores in the city..
then went wagamama for lunch... and again... its so damn good there
teriyakiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
and went for a few games of pool..

so that basically killed the day..

tuesday.. i just stayed home.. and ps2'ed?
fuck... so lame

and omg..
a while ago my motherboard fried, and went brown/orange..
and now after waiting 2 months, for warranty/processes, i received it..
but now what?
my video card fried too
thats just fucked up luck
im gonna go try the video card with the company and see what happens..
i think might have to wait another 2 months
im gonna explode soon.

giiiiiiiiiiiiid nite

victor

2009-01-15T00:04:00.000+11:00

this blog will continue until further notice
ahah garmon wtf!

aynway
lifes been preh shit with parents
they know im behind in school work nd shit, so now theyre bugging the fuck outta me, to study..
now, study, where do i start
what the fuck do i study
theyre justlik
ur gonna fail uni, study
i feel like year 11-12 all over again
i got pissed a few times too.
esp at this time, who the fuck is gonna study..?
and esp a fulltime job, i cant be fuckered.

arghh...

but on the lighter side, i have a newer promotion for work
gonna be managing a greater team, size wize..
and fuck baby haha.. getting 20.60 p/h now
and sat sundays i get the 1.5 and 2.0 rates

shall save up for something good soon

and omg.. now that im working so much
im missing out on so much fking shit..

ushans party was today
missed it because i had work
argh i feel so bad
and i know thres like a billion other outings, pokrdays and shit.. but haha i had to knock off so many that ppl just dont call anymore
im gettin a bit emo now over this

anyways seeyous

2009...

2009-01-10T17:01:00.000+11:00

whats to come?
a whoooooole year ahead of us......
its like a long ass road ahead.. where you cant see the end
but things willl come up..

anyway. ive made my choice to go to UWS Commerce..
then plan to transfer into another good uni.

so thats over with,

i havent been up to much, its kinda been slow for me..

working was prolly th most ive been up to

i spent 3 days after new years off, and spent it with family, and it was preh kool

oh yea, on wednesady.. i had a poekr day
that was preh fun
johnny came over in the mornin.. nd guitared a bit, then the rest of the guys came..
we had a full 8 player poker game
but i got knocked out first.. hahahah
i had a triple 10, and viray had a flush, but i had my triple on the river..
but i tried bluffing but he called :(

ahahah died....

but yea preh fun
we played a bit of nbalive 09

next mornin.. had work

and today..
just stayed home
my parents bought me new shoes :D

got work again tomorrow,..
5AM shift
so i gotta wake @ 3 again...........

anyways out.

resolutions

2009-01-01T22:59:00.000+11:00

well not really, havent thought of any..
maybe.. get into uni?
i dunno @ all.

this weeks beeen preh hectic
actually not really,
monday tuesday was just work..
and sick during work..
so yea.. i went.. and did paperwork and computer work instead..
nye was preh awesome..
went to ryanszetos
pokering/basketball/wii/shouldve swam../guitar/ and ryans collection of spirits
oh man there was everything..
french vodka, pure bicardi (75%).. i dipped my finger and i felt it tingling.. and when i sipped it.. my lips went numb
anyway.. there were like 9-10 different random drinks.. whisky/etc.

didnt get drunk though.. so all good

stayed up all night.. missed the fireworks (LOL)
and.. didnt sleep at all.
and wats funny, i stayed up,
work @ 12... which was today
and now im here
my eyes are baggyyyyyyy
and gosh i want to sleep
haha
but dont want to in a way
anyway, shall make some resolutions soon
:D

outs

sick =[

2008-12-28T20:32:00.000+11:00

very sick atm
how gay..
i worked 5 days straight.. even through christmas
i think thats prolly why
ahah
but good money during christmas and boxing day :D
im getting too carried away with money now :(

but yea.. :( sick now

my day off today..
and just home lying in bed..
ahah

anyway i hope some new shit comes soon
parties/outings
w/e
lol
lifes getting preh lame now..
cant wait till 2009
and i had a think about this..
all of 2008 was just random dramas for me
and that i pulled through 2008
im feel very achieveful.. (if thats word)

lifes life..

2008-12-24T00:42:00.000+11:00

i had many thoguhts throughout the past 3-4 days..

the first thing..
ive been going out alot, meeting up with friends alot, but i also been working alot..
but the thing is, ive been missing out on alot of outings, and
it hit me.. that this will be the last days/times we will actually be togeher, and hang as a big group..
like after the new years eve party.. or after new years, and when uni starts..
we wont be much together anymore.., there wont be those wild nights out, wont see some of the many funny people drunk, or see the funny things happen to people
its actaully quite sad :(
things will definitely drift, by the looks of it..
ah.. i shall cherish these moments
im gonna miss some of you's
really, and not in a gay way .

secondt hing..
university..
where will i be?
where do i go?
wll my parents are kool with things now, we are starting to be normal again, and trying to help much on my situation.
where will i be in 10 years time?
will i be the same guy.. doing the same job,
or will i be someone new, in a profession..
ahh it makes me so emo
oh well :(

---

these past few days have been preh kool..
last friday saturday and sunday was just work work and work..
preh normal shiet..
but on saturday.. finished work and got changed.. then went to the city..
went carols in the domain
man it was wierd shiet.., and crowded..
but the fireworks were exciting..
it brought up some things of the 'end oft he year' theme.. even though it wasnt end of the year..
many of the 2008 memories came flying by.. and wow, i made it through..

after that.. i went ushans house and slept over.
and the gay thing.. ushan put me and richard in a double bed
and he was doing gay shit to me.. yuck..
but yea. at night we had a d-n-m..
funny with him and this carmen chick..
but yea .. went through alot of things..

the next morning.. caught a bus straight to work
oh man i was tired
.

monday.. went shopping for gifts for parents
and thats bout it haah
preh lame..

today.. wasj ust work..
zzzz.

---

today at work.. they put on christmas carols through the airport speakers
man it made me sad..
it actually reminded me of my childhood and christmas
we use to be together as a family, and it was basically the same every year back then..
it was such good times. like, the little things that really made me happy, the fake santa stockings, with lollies in it, which i really waited for santa to come..,
my dad singing christmas carols to me
i dunno,, so many things..
but listening to carols really made me sad
so much has changed now..
i got work on christmas day..
my parents are just.. i dunno,
very lame, like christmas doesnt exist..
ahhh fuck i miss the old times

new years is gonna be even sadder
2008 is over
and all that we've/i've been through

oh well,
life moves on.

sixty something.

2008-12-18T22:51:00.001+11:00

well what a hectic week its been.
im glad and dissapointed at the same time.

recounts:
monday.. - well, basically.. chilled at home..
went city with nics in the arvo.. nd thats basically it
tuesday.. - woke up at 5AM and met with bill/stephen nd kelvin to go paintball
fekk it was preh good, painful though lol
got shot in liek a 1m range.. and i have this huge bruise, which is also scarred.. and it was bleeding on the day
argh
and i have shit all over my back! lol
anyway, afte rpaintball .. the guys drove back, and stopped at maccas.. where these white boys in BMW's wanted to start shit with us..
just as chris was about to do something.. they drove themselves off..
lol! .

then headed back..

and a little incident.. where john hit the back of chris's car accidentally
it was kinda weird.. and was a lil worried for both of them
lucky it was a red light and they all reacted
and it was a small dent, so it was alrite

went pho for lunch .. then met up with everyone else at the city to play cod5..
had jap for dinner (OMG it was so good) and then went home.
preh kool day

wednesday.. - well the HSC results day..
got my results 6AM texted to my phone
i loled and went back to sleep
estimated the UAI to be _ _ . _ _
i prefer not to type it
anyway.. i was preh cut
then went back to sleep
after that.. met up with seano and went to ushans house
preh kool bbq! :D
played some wii/bball/poker/ps2
chilled out
and after.. went to the city to
'susan's' party.. (just popped up).. @ norita

preh kool
unlimited alcohol.. nd never been to a place with so many smokers
like every 5 ppl 4 smoked
and there were more girls that smoked that guys
so strange
it was preh kool.. i got a lil off with the alco later in the night

i guess that night took my mind off my results :)
after getting kicked out at 2am.. we went darling harbour and slept/chilled there
fuken hobos i swear LOL.
harbourside.. 9 ppl just lying down there sleeping
the security came and woke us up..but went to sleep again
preh awesome night

richard was gold..
drunk and vomited his whole kebab onto the table at norita
sooooo gross..
and yea.. he was gone that night

after that.. we basically went back home at 6AM.. ready for the 'upcoming day'
thursday.. - so i slept when i got home.. at about 6:30.. and woke up at 11.. bcz ryan nd jared came over..
we chilled and played some guitar
and at night, went to desmonds dinner/18th party.
that was preh kool
"brazillian food"
interesting
then walked to this other place and had gelato
basically was a good night..

atm.. so damn tired
i received my final UAI today
cut to the max, and now finidng alternates
im disappointed, and my parents are too
but i am glad this year is over, and will look at starting something new

ill be copying something from garmons blog, because it is representing my exact feeling:

"For 12 years I've dreamt of success and something more. And although in the later years my expectations dropped a little I still retained a sense of hope. It took two seconds for me to realise that truth in my potential. My dreams are unachievable and I've nowhere left to go. My UAI is terrible and I'm feeling about as low as it is. Where did it all go wrong? How did it end up like this?

They say "it's not the end of the world" and "things'll be fine" but how the fuck should they know if they did good. I honestly expected much more from myself. Was I not committed enough? I tried, god knows I did but from what my results say it was obviously wasn't enough. I tried so hard to catch up that I didn't even understand what I was learning anymore.

So what's left for me? I didn't get into any of the courses I have a mild interest in. And if I do do something in university, it's likely I'll have little interest in it. Things are a blur and this post is so disconnected. I can't and won't enjoy my day. Perhaps it might even affect my week. I'm so happy for others. I'm envious but I'm glad they got what they got. They were rewarded for their efforts, I understand that. Congratulations to those people who got a decent score. It's disappointing to hear someone say they failed and then hear them say they got 80+. Most especially when you tell them you got a 62. And now this number here will forever be associated with my failure.

Right now, I close my eyes and imagine my whole neighbourhood, as though in every house there resides a year 12 student. And from birds' eye view I look down through their roofs. And in order they each stare at their computer screen before leaping with joy and running down to impress their parents with their UAI. This happens for about 10 houses before it gets to mine. I stare at my mark and put down the laptop before sitting on the side of my bed holding my head in my hands. And the camera moves onto the next house. Another satisfied student.

It doesn't feel like the world but it does feel like the end of my life. This is first thing in my entire life that I have ever regretted. This moment in my life I will never look back on and laugh. How I wish just to be someone else right now, anyone in this world. Just so long as I don't have to deal with the pain and anguish. Even lying in my bed trying to sleep hurts me. My chest feels heavy as if I'm about to cry but I don't. I can't. I won't." - Garmon

Thanks garmon.

awesome.

anyways outs

results soon

2008-12-14T21:30:00.000+11:00

now resorting to weekly blogging
i guess i havent been bothered to blog much now days

monday to wednesday was just work.. work work work
usual shiet.. and missed bball on wednesday when veryone went
ushan richard and alvin bummed at my place that day.. till like 12 when i had to leave

thursday.. went on a spending spree
omg.
intended to spend like 100 dollars.. but spend like 250
stupid impulse buying.. i was only gonna buy another remote so i can play with friends.. but there was just so much shit around the store..
anyway bough
-wii remote
-wii nunchuck
-wii zapper
-house of the dead 2 & 3
-wii points card

so thats thursday
friday..
sean came over?
lol basically bummed the whole day..
played like 6 horus of wii
nd guitar jammed
chilled
and yea.. random day killer

saturday
got a call from a interested web client
and yea, asked me to do a business proposal for their website nd web marketing
so yea, i had to do a presentation, make handouts, make powerpoint, datasheets, information..
and lol! i started the night before..
procrastinator to the max :(
anyway, it was convincing
luckily there was only 2 guys listening to me, and they were quite slow with comptuers

and so, i landed the deal, for 800 bux.. signed the contract that ill do the whole job
i guess its not that bad, but 800 bux for such a big website, is cheap
it should be lik 3-4 K plus ahaha
and its like 5 weeks work?
not full time btw.. prolly only like 30-40 minutes a day job sort of thing
but yea i was preh happy that i got that

nxt up, caught a train to flemington..
met up with garmon/jas/sean/chris/billyn
and chris drove us to homebush.. then caught a train to the city?
thn LOL.. played 4 hours of COD..
and viray/leith/david nd shit were there
damn im shit at those games now.. get headaches
firstperson shooting
argh!

lol

turning wuss now

after that.. had KFC and went home

it was like 10 already

mann it was a random day

anyway today.. was just boring
played wii.. watched the dark knight on computer.. and nothing else?
fucken boring
trying to findt things to do now
and same with tomorrow

anyway, outs

the past 5 days

2008-12-07T22:45:00.000+11:00

updation
well this is prolly just a recount
and the blog was rquested by alvin?.. bcz he was bored lol!

i guess i should blog, its been a while.

wednesday and thursday was just work work work. wake up in thee morning, get dressed and work.. come home at 10, slp,etc..
preh lame eh..
friday.. had a day off.. prh relaxing..
i got a wii game "battle of the pacific".. got bored of it after a while..haha
and the game was created by the "history channel"
wtf! ..
but first person shooting

so yea that..
then at night.. 24 the movie premiere was on.. watched that.. till 11 haha

saturday.. fuck
had work at 5 AM.. got up at 3 LOL!
dad drove me to rockky and caught the 400

oh dang.. it was hard, i was so drowsy..
then FUCKEN funny
i had 2 missed calls from richard from "12:30 AM"
so i decided to be a dickhead and text him back at 5am
and he replied "hey go on msn"
i wtfed to th max
and laughed my ass off

so yea, he was lik, lets go luna park.. even more randomer
and so i finished my shift at 2 PM.., then my relatives picked me up to go to their place.. which was extremely close to ushans house..
went to ushans instead, and got a change of clothes..
and went to luna park!!
LOL!!!!
i was piss tired at that stage.
so caught a bus to city with ushan, met richard halfway through the bus trip.. thn met sean at the city.

and went to luna park..
went on most of the scary rides..
and thats bout it..
after that it was getting a lil late, so we caught bus back to city and went darling harbour
pancakes at the rocks
ZOMG it was good.. and i got so full

we lined up 20 minutes for that restarant
anyway, had that, and went back to the station at about 11
and guess what
sunday morning work at 5AM again
wake up at 3
etc
GG
and yes, i am here atm, DEAD.
sean came over after i finished work today..
jammed on the guitar..
played for lucy and priss over the internt/phone

and chilled..
had dinner and he left..
i spent the last 4 and a half hours on th computer
really got nothing to say
im bombarded with work/shit

taking my leave next wednesday, for a week
oh yea baby..
6 days of ultimat freedom..
looking at going interstate or something for that tim period

lol!

oh and rsults
10 more days
im gonna FUCKEN jump off a cliff
thats all thats been on my mind
oh well

anyways, im outs.

damn its starting to hit me

2008-12-02T22:04:00.000+11:00

had a talk with huy
and guess whwat
results come in 15 days
FUCK

im feeling really shit bout this whole thing now
i mean how.. am i gonna react..
esp after the shit tests and results i been gettting
i already got cut from the rankings that were released a few days ago
it was all like 5-6th last
highest was like 6th last
jesus..

then when i get my result
ill be like
fuck
and my parents will be put down to the max
argh
gotta work out something..
arghhh

yestrerday.. went pool in the arvo with sean/bill/alison
and we won gaha :D
nd..
cruise last night was preh kool.. chilled.. danced.. food?
and yea preh gold haha
richard.. walking up to random chicks
hey wanna see my penis?
then asks steve if he wants to swim
nd fuk he looked drunk lol!!

but meh
some things didnt go very well on the cruise.. some ppl are just bitchy i guess
grahhhhhhhh
fuck

nyway i got work again tomorrow..
5 day weeks
but next week.. from thursday on i got 6 days off
its my leave haha
taken out already..
couldnt take more of this shit
prolly gonna quit after a few more weeks
might be going into teaching piano or something
45 per hour
jeeeeebus

anyway outs

the tiresome days

2008-11-30T22:36:00.000+11:00

well basically
last 3 days were work!!
fuck haha
friday morning was preh kool
my dad took me to hurstii and bought the wii :D
got a free game with it.. the mario olympic games? LOL
but yea fuk wiis awesome
loving it
then in the arvo went to work. did the same old shit... boring now days.. got home at 10 and slept
same shit next day haha
work..
played wii in the momrining.
today was a lil fked though
i had the morning shift.. 5AM..
gg to the max haha
so did that.. then yea.. got home and slept
bought a HD cable for wii
preh good quality now..

going MRSKY cruise tomorrow.. yay :|

but yea, 2 more days off. then the hwole week of work starts again on wedesnday..

zzzzzzz
outs

party

2008-11-27T22:19:00.000+11:00

so yea basically
it was a mad party :)
we met up at coles in the morning.. bought like 110 dollars worth of shit.. and trolleyed it to my place ..
then had the bbq
didnt start off well though.. as willy/ushan were having an argument over the phone.. bcz ducky was with ushan the whole time and wanted to tag along
but overall it was kool, he ddint end up coming..
so we had a bbq.. played tennis.. chilled
then after we went sauna-ing!
ahaha so gay.. like 9 of us (guys) in the sauna.. sweating like pigs..
THEN jumped into the freezing poool
oh dang that was painful
so yea.. had some fun.. then went and played poker and chilled in the spa..

at night.. everyone came upstairs and had dinner and pokered

thoguht everyone left after.. leaving me/philp/willy/swong nd roger..
played poker all night.. and
played this water/big2 game..
loser drinks 2 cups of water.. and has to last timme 5 AM
haha fuck me and willy lost it.. and yea..
we had to drink philips mix of shit..
sweetchilisauce/frenchdressing/raweggs/coke/oj/nacho sauce
FUCK it was disgusting
oh well ahha

it was preh kool
had an awesome 2 days

and fuk.. those are the only 2 days off work
got work tomrorow
im doing 5 days now fekk
but working as teamleader.. because after i left to do my HSC.. most ppl resigned and we have a whole heap of new people..
now that im back.. i know most of the shit.. so now im the supervisor of the new group ahha
higher pay nd etc :D

so preh awesome
working heaps though.. getting kinda tiring

i guess im not going anywhere now..
probably work/work/work and 2 days off
a week
ggggggg

outt

hmm the day

2008-11-25T22:58:00.000+11:00

i guess nothing much happened
had work today..
tired?.. meh

having a party tomorrow
and guess wat, its ruined again because i know ppl are gonna crash

and neon
he calls me
WITHOUT saying hi, without saying hello
"why the fuck wasnt i invited"
who thef uck does he think he is
some kingshit?
get the fuck out.
and explained . that this party is an exact party from 2005, same list of 12 ppl.
which was EXACTLY what i did, invited the same 12, do the same thing
but their minds are so hung up over having a fucken party, and being invited or not
neon especially.

oh well im expecting dipshits to crash,

fuck it
some ppl are just complete faggots

im gonna sleep.

2008-11-24T23:33:00.000+11:00

well a few things
i am still pissed at this dickhead
he was one of the guys that got drive to the formal by my dad
but okay, he forgets his ticket quarter of the way through, my dad drives him back and gets his ticket. my dad gets a lil pissed bout it. great.
then next morning, we all wake up from rogers party, he had a taxi ready, and hejust fucks himself off and goes, 'find your own way home'.
well i dont know what other ppl think of this, but what i see is totaly dickheadness
my dad drives him round alot, like from city a few times, that ruse cruse, and all that.
think ur too good for ppl?, up ur ass?.. ive been seeing alot of things in that fucker, ever since the start of the year..
like he use to come over alot and yea, this is another scenario
i give him drinks, coke w/e
ok thats normal, ppl come over, give drinks
then when i have a drink at school, and i was PISS thirsty, he goes hey give me a sip bro.. im like nah im thirsty srsly.
and what he says "ok bro wateva.. im never giving you drinks ever again".
what do i say to that?
and like gorup outings, like esp with like us hurstiis, me sean and all that say our byes..but he just faces the other way and walks off.
take a good hard look at yourself. i know ur up urself, id rather see you jump off a cliff.

oh and u forgetting your formal ticket?, funnny that u started blaming sean or other ppl. your not the king of this world. funny how u started calling sean dog because u missed signout day too. what is sean meant to do? tell you everysingle fucking thing?, and then you start blamign sean?, this is ur own organisation, signout day is the most important day of the school. well yea. blaming other ppl is the easy way out, i do know. i can blame anything on anyone. i can blame people for pissing my dad off too.

i block deleted him and hope to never associated with dipshits like that ever again.

anyway.. had a rough day at work too
one of the bogans got fired on the spot.. preh funny..
turns up to work drunk?.. well thats hilarious.
anyway, it was preh shit
on my lunch break..
random bogans come up to me..
HEY its the bonfire guy
i have no fucking idea how they know, maybe its my name tag or w/e, but it pisses me off
then theyre like
hey SCHOOLIES brahhh schoolies.. u fucking working now huh?
and u know, its alright if it was bogans from our school
but this wasnt
it was complete randoms.

im really getting hammered and i feel like shit

oh wells.

gnitiez.

ultra mega

2008-11-24T00:36:00.000+11:00

meh what week its been!
so after the aftermath of that formal and afterparty.. things started cooling down
slept all wednesday morning..fking tired..
and ahha my date was still at my house
i didnt even remember
but anyway, she left like after i woke up.. been doign shifty things on my computer

so basically rested on wednsday..
thursday.. stayed at home.. went to tom lees hosue at night
got my gibson lespaul from him
ahah taking care of that sexy lil baby.. while hes in corea
getting strings changed nd all that.
got 4 guitars at home now.. my rooms gettin small.
friday..chilled at home again! and.. went out for dinner? ahha
nothing much at all
saturday.. well.. got a new pair of Avies! haha
preh slick.. went out for lunch nd thats bout it
sunday.. went to watch a movie .. quantum of solace
pfffff wat sort of movie was thaT!
didnt get it.. oh well

totally shizz and emo now.. when u like a girl, but the girl has this piss off sort of attitude.. cold attitude? agasint you.
been going through it.. but ah damn..
oh and acting all like, huh? nah im not,
yea bull shit.
oh well.

anyway i got work thiw eek
geegee. oh well.
getting a wii on wednesday
:D

off.

the formal

2008-11-20T00:11:00.000+11:00

well it was.. okay?
lolz..
music was shit, because neonf orgot his disk LOL.
oh well
then the afterparty
alot of funny shit happened.
ppl got drunk
johnny passed out.. and ppl threw up all over him
then ushan takes a shower for him
froggy punched a hole in the wall, because he thoguht it was a black man swearing at him
etc.
preh funny shit

guess we had a fun night.
anyways out

the official end of high school

2008-11-17T20:19:00.000+11:00

wow.. we signed out today.
probably the last time i ever go back to that place again
had a memorable day.. walked around to all teachers, signed me off, had the good lucks and yea.. basically the end. got our formal tickets and yea..
went seanos house.. chilled.. then he came over
preh random day actually.

last friday.. frank came over in the morning.. played a bit of guitar/record and yea chilled out
then at night we went on this so called 'outing' to a house party
and LOL it was a christian party, which i did realise before hand, but still went bcz they all did, but ended up coming out like 10 minutes later
it was fken funny
all ended up going city.. for net cafe ahahah

saturday
got my suit for the formal/haircut and the call for a shift on sunday morning.

sunday
went back to work.
it was fucked up.
i walk in, the whole team changed.. all new people.
it really has changed that much in 5 months
preh scary. im wokring with all new people now.
same position as team leader/supervisor, but harder to talk to?.. lol dunno
things feel different
a whole heap of ppl were sacked during my leave time, and many resigned.
that kinda scares me
oh well.

when i got home,, was piss tired and went to sleep.

omg formal tomorrow.
worried worried worried.
stressing.
wats shit is andrew ta says
there is no video/no schedule/no cake/no speeches/no awards/no organised things.
now thats fucked up. and i blame both andrew and our year.
its gonna be a shit night
and wats fucked is that tables were randomly generated bczc ppl ddint bring in table lists
but i guess im fine haha, luckily put onto a table.
tomorrow night is gonna be shit and i can see it already.

outs.

blow it over

2008-11-14T00:34:00.000+11:00

this whole thing should blow over soon
its not as easy as expected.
article gets published
things spread
principal calls me in
police station calls me
media on my ass
danger of getting myself bonfire
its so fucked right now
the article is like all over aus now.. bris/mel/canberra/ etc
and TODAY
fuck.
singtao newspaper writees shit about me
translates that smh article into chinese
and makes it sound twice as bad
my dads going to look into this and probably screw these guys over/sue them
i never gave consent to them to do a report
they cant just do whatever they want
im copping so much shit from family friends/random asians in hurstville
its like im a shit image now
to their kids who are studying.

fuck it all.

sick

2008-11-11T19:29:00.000+11:00

so monday.. i wake up and gosh
i was sick
itchy throat
everything
argh!!, felt like shit
ayway finished up cleaning my room/books and etc.
was gonna go froggys.. but was like.. drowsy
and yea ended up with a fever when the night came

tuesday..
mum woke me at 6:00.. and said i was int he newspaper
rofl..
and so i was.. then went online
my face ont he front page.. for half the day
so douche
and it was a shit article.. made me look like crap.

the day throughout were just phonecalls..
channel 9, a current affair, and a variety of media and event copmanies
decided to ignore all that and went to johnny house
haha FIRST TIME i ever tasted real pho
oh my god it was like.. orgasmic!
anyway.. jammed a bit, fixed his virus..
and yea.. lol
preh boring

i got a big day tomorrow
ms lyons calls me and goes
"victor, we need to talk"
and i was like
FUCK.

tomorrow, im going channel 9 hq, probaby do the interview there or something
then afte.r. i dunno
its a big week

anyways out.

drained

2008-11-09T20:38:00.000+11:00

ahha
went to allans music today .. with sean and jared
i bought a new pedal
oh mannnnnn its so damn good
all analogue sound, so everythings natural
the sound is like sooo damn awesome
$355 dollars
bought johnnys lead
and yea..
sean got his acoustic and so did jared
preh kool

basically jamemd all arvo

thoguh now im starting to feel like shit
the event failed, and yea, im gonna be dead with the amout of ppl that are gonna send emails/hate mail.
bruce wants to buy my formal ticket, but i dont know if i shoudl sell or not, thoguh i dont have a formal date atm
fuck!, so im in the middle of everything lol!
im starting work on wednesday.. because ive been off for 4 months and still emplyed and the headoffice said i have to start or im going to be terminated..
and argh
so stressful atm
i have no formal suit, no formal transport
anything ahha
my heads spinning
anyways out.

yay

2008-11-08T23:07:00.000+11:00

meh..
friday.. was preh boring
cleaning up my room and etc.
then james drove by and drove me to aquatic.. and watched that alias game vs some blakehurst team
ohhh man so close, but techies lost :(
then james drove me home again..
that killed like an hour.. so random lol
saturday..
preh kool day
went to allans music with jared.., big sale there
so hes buying an acoustic i think and im buying an effects processor
oh mannn im in love with it
360 bux. and i think they're selling to like 295 or something
then had lunch at 'wagamama'
oh man it was expensive, but orgasmic!!.. chicken teryaki with rice
ohhhhhhhhhhhhh baby.. anyway
going to allans again tomrowo with jared, and sean,.. whos going to start guitaring too
ahha, funny how convincing i was.
"hey man, get a guitar tomororw, its on sale, preh cheap"
"you wont be bored these holdiays either"
and hes like
fuck ok why not :D
so random
but yea
so going there again.. gonna spend some money.

anyways out

procrastination - really

2008-11-07T00:36:00.000+11:00

haha procrastination still lies here, even though i finished exams
now it involves cleaning up my books, storing notes away, and yea.. cleaning up the mess.. which doesnt seem to be happening
argh!!
i tried, for like 45 minutes, and got like
sneezy/drowsy bcz of all the dust
and went to sleep again
so weird
watched some movies and played max payne
today however, i did the same thing, tried cleaning the room, except the journalists came over.. to talk about that facebook thing
haha
and took pictures of me like all over the house, even though they only need one pic
random
shoudl be published this saturday.. if not then enxt monday
at night.. went to star city buffet.
it was preh good, but i prolly only ate like $5 of the 30 dollars
bcz i dont eat prawns
fuk ppl had moutainfulls of prawns
after that.. the 18;s went for a few rounds inside the casino.. nd we waited
then walked to cityhunter and played games
nd then went home.. which was fuckin shit bcz we wnated to play pool

and rofl.. francis .. you read my blog :@

anyway, out.

another hectic week

2008-11-05T10:40:00.000+11:00

just going to recap.. and state the excitement! of.. finishing the FUCKING HSC
oh fucking baby
anyway,
last thursday: studied in the morning?.. then in the arvo.. went to city and met up wtih aaron ngan.. and went to a UTS interview.. (it was a journalist) for the uni=student something.. but w/e.. got that over wtih, and went back home.. then at like 10 in the night.. smh calls me and does the interview.. how random, tried getting to him the whoel day.. but he 'starts work' at 9 in the night
how strange.
last friday: stayed home.. and.. had tutoring at 5
yea.. it was geting close.. so we did some physics, got update
saturday/sunday: at home 'supposedly' studying.. but nah
monday: stayed at home.. then went library.. tried studying.. until nic nd e came..
tuesday: well this is the day!!
did my physics exam.. then fucked it.. but hey, the hapiness of finishing HSC overpowered that sadness.
so kelvin came over, chilled
then nic and e came.. messed up my fuckin ghouse.. THEN stephen / jason / khai tan
anyway.. it was preh fun
we left at like 5 for the city
first met ppl at central
then went poker! and list $10.00
lol!, i guess i suck now days..
it was preh fun
and omg that place, alias or jason spilled some sort of tomatosauce on their couch.. the guy was like, you guys are idiots for byo, we sell food, we might charge you extra blah blah.. and i was scared omg.. mainly because it was upstairs of somewhere in chinatown, and that guy looked gangster.. scary stuff :(
so then i was bored.. so jason and i went upstairs to marketcity and played some airhockey.. until the firealarm went off
sooooo damn loud.. then fire engines nd shit started coming... preh random
so went back to the poker place to see the progress of raymond eric and bond..
shit game
then after we went dinner in chinatown and met up with johncho/ware/chris
and went pool
MADDEST place.. had heaps of fun..
stayed till like 12.. and got home

then it struck me...
the END of HSC..
the fucking up of physics.. the day the results come.. the day i see my UAI, the day i choose uni/tafe.. or the day i just fail..
made me emo all night
:(
i also feel the fact, that i might not see 80% of the ppl again from school
argh its so sad...
everything started going throguh my mind....
then stresses.. theres 2 more weeks till formal too LOL
i havent got a suit, i havent got a date, i havent bothered doing anything for the formal

anyway, gonna start checking off my
"AFTER HSC MUST DO" list
theres 46 things on there
so anyway ttyl blog
:D

hectic.. not

2008-10-30T01:42:00.000+11:00

no really. everything is fucked up right now.
recap of the two *hectic* weeks
last tuesdsay: went to kogarah library with desmond, and wtf, see sean, willy tt, mitchell, benny nd korlab. studied like a tiny bit?.. the whole session was a joke, andt he fking 4uniters were laughing at me doing 2 unit. douchebag tot he max!. like okay, i forgot to put the calculator in degree mode instead of radians, and i got a strange answer like 1 degree, on a triangle that looks normal. and they wer like rofl.
had tutoring that day aswell, so got back to hurstii and went..
last wednesday: stayed at home trying to study maths.. oh well.
last thursday: well, made a lie to my parents, and went to the city, and met with 'event organisers'.. after seeing how that facebook shit turned out. it was one of those board room thingies, and a big round table, with leathery chairs all around it, and we discussed various issues. nd agree to do it at darling harbour with liek fireworks nd shit. and wow, they offered a job position after hsc, for marketing/databasing.
okay all happy. the worst shit comes later, will be said.
friday: went to school with desmond, did alot of music work, and foold around a bit with music. then after went dougies, and library.., and played the comptuer? rofl.., and then sean and his friends were there.. we competed in a maths paper. funny.
weekend: basically stayed at home and did jack?, tried study maths. but fully got drifted away.
monday: maths exam. had a headache,badmood,hayfever,box of tissues on the table. i oculdnt concentrate. i was sitting there feeling liek shit, and tried writing and doing quesitons. i ended up being not bothered. fuck, and 3 hours just went by. really felt like shit. after that, got some food and studied music.., which then came up, and argh!, that was fucked up.. it was like crazily wtf. it was all analyse this analyse that, listen to this, and analyse that. prolly got like 30% literally, which then scales my compostion and performance down. this was the most important exam. fuck!.
jordan drove me home later that day.., very fucking depressed.
tuesday: stayed home all day and supposedly "studying". oh well
wednesday: went to work with parents, helped out with some important things.. then came back home.. didnt do any work again. i got tired and went to sleep, and now im up at 2:15 AM. proly go sleep again.
now the fucked up about today was when i called the event organisers. they offered me the best shit witht he bonfire. the event grew from like 150 people to 8100 people, and yes, they were gonna make it a huge event for nsw. now they call me up saying they didnt agree to anything, didnt sign anything, they dont want the bonfire event under their name, and the event isnt 'feasible'. i got so pissed at that guy. their company is full of bullshit. argh. now im stuck here with nothing. like waht the fuck? they call me up going, hey the agent of sneaky sound system said yes, then again, we can do for $30.00 per person, and fed me with all this good bullshit. now they pull out.
i sent out invites to all 8000 people, and now what?, im fucked. im gonna be the biggest bullshitartist alive. i should just run away from australia..,
i got two interviews tomorrow, one with a smh journalist, and another with a UTS student, whos doing first year journalism who wants an insight to this whole thing. what can i say.. this hwole thing was a publicity stunt, and wont hppen. im in deep shit right now. the event organisers said if i mention their company in any manner not appropriate, i will get sued.
FUCK.
my whole days been killed.. this whole thing is fucked up.
fucked up.
stupidest shit alive, wtf am igonna do
this is bullshit
its depressing, but okay.
the thing now is im gonna get a lawyer and declare this bonfire intellectual property. no fucking asshole, especially the company like that, take advantage of this and make money off it next year.
im in the shittest position ever, my mind is spinning.
fuck fuck fuck.

i don't know what im gonna do
i wont be doing anything after hsc except sulk.
fucking bullshit.. everything

physics.. hahh.real funny
20%, just like all the other tests
my uai is gone already

out.

lol@english

2008-10-20T20:00:00.000+11:00

its the end of english
i have it in a pile now, in the corner of my room
ready for the bonfire

went okay, considering the amout of study i did.
made up a related text on the spot, becuase douchbags decided to ask for two
oh well,

i had a rough night last night
i used my report marks to type into the UAI calculator
i got 53.85
cut to eh max
really, if i get that low
im gonna do many stupid things
probaby run away from home
join the navy
or something stupid, but not suicide
or maybe

anyway, after that english exam, everythings quite relaxing.
p[layed some bball with seano and jlin nd steve

anyways out

I have ended they journey.

2008-10-17T21:36:00.000+11:00

wooo
haha
studied quite a bit
the day before.
wrote creative 3 tiems, and did the essay once
and yea, preh happy
BUT fuck
after that, ppl go, yea, i did twelve pages, i did a whole booklet, and etc
and im like
oops.
but i did write non stop though
amybe my writing was smaller
oh well

paper 2
now thats something im fked on

tttttttttttyls

The day has finally come

2008-10-16T09:04:00.000+11:00

The day we've been working 12 years on.

It has come.

Tomorrow will be the first exam.. english

now the fuked thing is that, now that i have actually started studying on it.. i wish i had more fucking time!!!
i re-wrote my essays like 3 times last night, and ill try again today, memorise and all that

ahha fuk, its so stupid how i want more time now..
but i guess, if there werent this deadline, iw ouldntve have started at all..

and i did a creative on music, so i hope thatd be something different, and impress the judges.
gg.. its starting to hit me now,

oh well

i havent left the house since sunday morning.. which was for tutoring.. haha
supposedly "studying"

i finished watching the whole season of deathnote, and its first movie, during this week.
fuck!, and i didnt study

oh well, ill rely on some luck to get okay in this exam and score for a high UAI

glllllllllll

and.

2008-10-11T20:10:00.000+11:00

haha last night.. i had this dream

scary shit..

i was at school, the back oval.. and was like playing soccer or something?

then a batch of helicopters and planes flew in.. and landed.. and there came like heaps of army/federal agent guys and started shooting at us with machine guns..

and then i looked at my finger and like.. i lost my middle finger, and looked ont he ground.. and was bleeding heaps

it was a sccary experience..

and i was like fuck am i gonna die now or something..

i felt the bullets.. it was like hard punches/pinches focused in areas of the body..

and so i read in google this morning.. it said that this may have been caused becuase of being stressed/anxious/anxiety to an upcoming event.

im guessing the HSC..

OR this could be a premonition.. this might happen..

fully random.. its strange too

anyway.. i had a preh shitstudied week..

thursday.. i went library.. for like 30 minutes and left again haha

i coudlnt concentrate at all...

it was terrible.. at the back it was full of people, and i was lucky to find myself a seat int he middle of everyone..

so goddam noisy.. everyones shouting/talking/chucking papers

so much for the "quiet room" with a big sign saying "no talking"

oh well..

so yesterday, i stayed home.. studied a bit, facebooked alot, and.. yea

today was preh much the same.. lol

6 more days till test!

ohemgee.

gonna .. go study now ;)

stressingful

2008-10-08T20:02:00.000+11:00

sure is.

i've actually done work :D

lol
had a preh random week.
like saturday to monday.. i was basically at home.. with parents, doing work?..
and contracted a fucking virus.. that wiped most of my computer.. and my start menu/taskmanager, and all that..
oh well, not like i really need to use it.
i can type a blog, look at facebook and msn :D and maybe wordprocess, but havent tried :P

yesterday.. i went to my dads office.. helped him out.. and did some of my own work

today however was preh fun :D
ryan called us over for a "study" session..
THEN DUCKY came
"fuck study"
and so we did..
played basketball/swam/guitar/nintendo/laptop/games
ahahah
well i did like 1-2 horus of study atleast today, but 6 hours was just killed palying..

oh well
gottakeepstudying
need to get into uni!!

anyways/out

the aftermath

2008-10-04T12:53:00.000+10:00

lol. not really

but yea, its been one dead silent week
everything seems to have died off.. communications with friends.. studying, and i dunno.. it just seems dead. its most liekly because of HSC.

haah god, another korean (who i shall not name) has caused problems with me. now ive had a shit week again. i dunno, is it me, or is it the koreans, not to be racist or anything.. its just a question.
and this fight was over the littlest thing. now he's done the "cut - off" from me, as in delete me off facebook, block me, delete me off msn, and yea, kinda fuck off thing. and the thing was, that we were preh close, for the past 2 years.

but, wateva, we said our goodbyes, and yea.

this week.. was preh random..

monday and tuesday i just stayed at home doing jackshit, 'tried' to study, but yea, ended up watching deathnote, watching some movies, and yea..
on wed and thurs, i went dads office, as he dragged me.. and yea, workd, did quite a bit of physics there, and had tutoring afterwards so i got driven.
friday.. omg so hot!! like 30degrees?, just chillin, didnt do any work, wlel couldnt anyway..
i had tutoring after, so that counts as a bit of work
today.. fucking bludgy day..
might do some work

anyway, i'm out.
glhf.

now thats the end of that chapter

2008-09-27T17:06:00.001+10:00

It has been a hectic week...
I've thought over so many things over the last few days. First thing, talking to my friends, and going, “ohh man, remember in year 7 we did this this and that and in year 8 that that and that”.
There were just so many and the convo’s got to points where I started tearing up. Like fuck :(, it was so happy back then. The experiences are priceless.
Also, including those speeches that the captain and people did, it made me go a bit teary. I held it back.

Ms Blake....
I may have hated her, but really, she’s done so much for us, organising everything, calling up my parents bcz I jigged, being late, everything!, but without her I wouldn’t be who I am right now. She’s been by my side since the first day. 6 years gone by. I would really like to, say in 20-30 years time, see her again, and chat/have a few laughs about the experiences. I guess we could do a reunion sometime soon too, where we all come back, and see each other/talk.

Keeping in touch was many of the things I told people to do
People like Jimmy He, Eddy Kent, Bailey, and all that...
Like, they were really close friends in year 7 and year 8, but onwards, I kind of drifted off. Now that graduation day has come, I really hope we’ll still keep in touch, have a few laughs about the times together in year 7 and 8, or even onwards.

Last night, at about 1 AM when I got home, I had a shower and started reading the yearbook. couldn’t let it go.. At some points I was gonna like cry. You know what else I’m gonna miss..
School.
The school itself, you know, I may go to school to play some basketball, or go there to do my HSC in 20 days time, BUT, I will never get to go back to a classroom, with friends, with a teacher pestering you what to do. There won’t be any conversations with friends, where a teacher will go "shut up stop talking", or “tuck your shirt in”, or uniform pass checks, or whatever. Everything!
I wish we could re-live those memories.
I didn’t really like it, when I started acting sad, and people go, 'fucks sake, your gonna be back here in like 20 days time.. Seriously.
And I’m u don’t understand.. Srsly.

I will also miss teachers, they’ve just done so much for me, not just teaching me maths or science, but rules of life. I remember many of the teachers, telling me, rules of life, well not rules, but like, what makes you a better man. Especially the teachers like Mr Edwards, Towner, Coolston, argh.. so many to list. And omg.. my year 8 history teacher, Mr Landsberger. He was always so nice to me. We also had him for rollcall, from like year 9-10 and a bit of 11. And there are also unknown teachers, who I’ve had, like Ms Berios. I haven’t seen her for ages, like since start of year 11 when I had her. She gives me quite a few memories in class. Not doing homework and getting like 12 letters a term, for incomplete homework. I hated you. But now, I call that an experience in your class. There’s so many things to name, so I think I’ll stop now.
Haha I’ve had so many random thoughts, of things like the movie ‘click’.
Rewind in life, and watch what life was like back then, watch urself, smile, jump around or whatever. Argh, well, it’s just thoughts...

This might sound gay, but listening to the song Graduation – Vitamin C, really touches me. It’s so cliché though, but whatever. Even in year 11, after listening and watching the music video, I got a bit weird. These things started hitting me harder and harder, since the end of year 11, and into year 12. I remember clearly, and also saying to my parents, “There’s only 3 terms left of schooling”

Everything’s still weird, that it just ended like that. I don’t think I have reacted to it yet, but whenever I think about it, its: ‘yesterday was our last time together as a group, at school, in our uniforms, and class rooms and also our last time with teachers, although we may still be able to keep in touch with them after a number of years.

ALSO the people that you just ‘see’ everyday and say hi to and the people that we have never actually gotten to know, I will miss that too. Stangely.
High school will always be a part of me, and I will never forget it.

Ha-ha I’m like writing a captains speech here or something
but I really feel better writing this.

I also realised, we all have to move on in life. We won’t be in high school forever.

OMG and you know what I hate, adults going to me,
“You have finished high school, everything after high school will go so fast, past your eyes, in a flash, and you’ll be where we are now”.

Anyway, recap of the last few week of school:

Monday:
I think I blogged already. Didn't do much, classes were empty, and yea..
Kelvin came over after school, watched some movies and that's about it.

Tuesday:
It was the manly 'science' picnic. We met up at Hurstsville in the morning, and got our daytripper tickets, which we paid 2 dollar extra for to the school for some reason, and headed off to Circular Quay. Walked around the beach, then got ourselves some coffee, and talked. It was mainly me, Alvin and S.Lew..

Did get extremely boring, but yea.. We caught a ferry back to Circular Quay, and then headed off to Allans Music, for some guitar strings and to test out some new guitars.

After that, we went net cafe.. killed 3 and a half hours on COD2. Me, Ushan, Stephen, Alvin, James, John Cho, Jeff, and forgot who else.

Wednesday:
It was the muck up photo day. I got to school, got bored. And so I found Jared.. he brought his guitar and a new set of strings.. so I spent the first period restrining it and polishing it. Then after that, it was second period, where we prepared for muck up. It was hilarious, Neon, J.Lin, Froggy, Alvin, and all dressed up as St George Girls.. in their uniform, but just a lil sluttier (froggy) LOL. It was so fking hilarious.

I was in the VA room, so I found a piece of cloth and yea.. put it over myself. I know its lame, but its the least I can do.

And so, we took the muck up photos, raided a few classes rooms, and had our fun. After that, we went home. Oh yea, we had pho with GMan/Chrislee and S.Lew..

Pretty exciting day.

Thursday:
It was our junior uniform day. Sean came early in the morning to school and brought me a blue shirt, and I brought a junior tie. It was a hilarious day, took heaps of photos/luvos, with nearly everyone in the grade.

I decided to stay the whole day. “Make the most out of the last day of class and at tech”. I stayed till 3:05, waited patiently for the bell, and got on the school bus. Wearing the junior uniform made the day even better, as it reminded us of the old days, catching the bus after school, waiting for the bell, and all that. Ahh.. the good old days.

Then after that, me and Sean went library, chilled till he had tutoring. Then this graduation thing started hitting me. Hard, in the head, and yea.. cried a bit.

Friday:
Sad day :’(
Got to school heaps early in the morning, helped out Mr Owens set up the equipment and stage for the group. Then after, I got my brekkie, and headed off to rehearsal. I got my solos and all that prepared and ran it through with the group. I wasn’t too happy with the guitar solo though, it was too soft they said. Oh well. Then I soloed again, the school song haha. It was like the remixed version. Oh and what I also noticed, was that alot of people cried. I held my self back, but looking down from the stage, like 30-40 odd people were crying. It’s so sad, especially when Francis was making a speech. I would’ve cracked, but yea, biting myself not to.

Anyway, after that, we caught the bus to “Doltone House” and had our luncheon there. I got my shirt signed, and a lot of pictures taken. It was emotional, watching the videos, the captin making the speech, the principal, and all that. Argh, it was sad. Memorable though. Had a good meal too :D. I said most of my goodbyes that day.

After that, we went to Steve’s house.. had a beer played some guitar and sang some songs. That was when I started turning emotiona;. It was with the group I have hung around for like the past 3 years.. with like Neon, Jlin, Sean, etc. Funny Eric had half a bottle of beer, and started acting weird. He saw a tennis ball fly in the sky, and we looked, nothing was there. Randomest guy..

So after bumming there, we went to Ramsgate met up with Neon’s STG friends. Played footy on the beach, took some photos, and yea, had a bit of fun. At night, we went Brighton, a much better place. Frank and Neon bought so much alki. Frank had a bottle of vodka. Funny, he had HALF a bottle!!, that huge bottle that is. THEN smoked 4 puffs of weed, and he was so fking dead/gone. He was like nearly dropping on the ground, but not quite. It was scary. We played a few games in the dark, ran around the beach, sang some songs. It was quite fun, and yea, a good way to spend the night. Later we got driven by Maz, I think that’s her name, and yea, got home quite late.

When I got home, sat down, and looked at my signed shirt. Memories/thoughts again.. then sat down with my dad and had a long talk about high school, and what after. It really is a big upstage, to finish high school, and head off into this new world out there. I had a look at the portfolio, and the yearbook. Oh and also the report. Fucking shittest report ever, but wateva.

Then went to sleep.

Today, I have family friends coming over, just gonna chill/relax. Have a bit of fun.

What a week it’s been. Seriously.
This shall remain on this blog forever, and I will read back to this as often as I can.

Good Bye People.

(LOL 1817 Words! More than any assignment I did! :D)

4 Days left..

2008-09-22T19:12:00.000+10:00

title explains it.
stuck in my head
:(
i had quite a hectic weekend.
satuday, got my haircut
boring
but sunday
it was the performance night at the opera house "sydney regional Music Festival"
oh mangg ppl were pro there.......
and so yea, went int he morning for soundcheck/equipement check..
they told me to have my guitar on low volume, and they were gonna amplify through the soudn system
and i wa slike
fuck
couldnt fake or anything.
anyway, after we finished wiht that
me and matt walked aroudn city..
found garmon/francis/ken/jackee etc at the state library
how random haha.
we spent all day walking in suits, firstly we looked like douchbags, and secondly it was fucking hot. my suit was wet.. literally haha. with sweat
but it was fun
we watched a movie "tropical thunder". FUNNIEST MOVIE! LOL
and then we playd a game of air hockey... then caught a taxi back to the operahouse

we got out performance over and done with
we had the full house, which was 2400 or osmething watching
fuck haha

and okay, that was over and done wtih
I WALKED OUT
the' st george year 11 cruise'
bronson and ducky popped up
and i was like wat hte fuck
anyway, it was about ot leave
so i ran and jumped on
THEY DIDNT CHECK THE TICKET (which was like $30 bux? or $35)
ahahah
free ride!!
like i was in my suit, and they were like just about to pull away the stairs
then they were like, just hurry up
and i ended up going on
free food/free dirnks
fixed up my dinner

preh funny shit

had a preh awesome night/ apart from the fact that, my parents were on my back, expecting me home by 9.. i ended up going home at 1 AM.

monday
shit school day/boring/tired/hot/humid/fuck it.
did fuck all
kelvin came over after shcool.. watched harold and kumar

manly excursion tomrorow
fucking stupid
no ones going
i paid and said i was ognna go
im gonna be bored fuckless/

also found out something interesting
there is always different versions of songs from limewire and itunes
i bought a few songs off itunes today, which are impossible to get downloaded

anyway, some pic
s

virus

2008-09-19T20:14:00.000+10:00

OMG virus on the computer
cleared my startmenu/command/run/login
everything?
oh well,
using computer guest account haha
fix it later

and what a week its been

wednesday was like the randomest day/shortest day
jigged all day, went to none of the 3 periods i had
then went hurstville and watched a movie witha friend
the mummy.
preh kool, jet li :P

after that was trivia night
GOLDEST shit ever, we all dressed up in boxes, and beanies, then put newspaper/plastic bags around us
hobo to the max!
but we still lost the theme competition
AND lost the trivia
aha damn

had a bit of fun atleast

thursday,

random day again
went to first period which was music
then after music, went to nothing else,
so kevin came over..
killed like 4 nd a half hours?
bored as..
then i went to sleep
at night, it was preh fun
our music class/teacher organised an outing, and dinner
so we went to newtown and had thai food
haha it was kool to have this little get together.
talked, bummed around a bit, then had gelato, and etc
and discovered the real mr owens when hes not teaching
funny

at the end of the night
mrgamage drove me and dominic home
what a nice teahcer
he lives all the way down in cantubury, which is like close to newtown, and still dropped us off on the other side of sydney

thanks!

friday
today was shit
went music first, then after, it was just bludge off
played some guitar with johnny
restrung my guitar, ready for sunday, and polished
the rest of the day i spent int he VA room
lying down on the table sleeping?
then had rehersal after schoo..

and sunday! got a performo at the opera house
out little jazz band
gonna be doing guitarddd
i got so much time to kill on sunday
farrrk, i start at 12:30, for soundcheck and stage setup, for half n hour, THEN the real performance starts at 7:30
fuck!
ohwell

note to self
MAKE THE MOST OF THE LAST 5 days of school!!!

Just some thoughts

me and ushan had a talk about how people are treating and friends and etc
like, people who follow the 'trends', and start dogging people and etc
lately, he's been throguh some, and
fuck i have been throguh heaps when i was at the courts
now, i never go down there
well since the start of year 12
it hink ive blogged this before,
but really, the people down in the VA room, or the passive area, is a much more friendlier place
the people down at the courts, are just
irresponsible?
dont give a shit about anything?
for example, i was close friends with sean, well i still am or maybe not, dunno, but when hes around with alias/bruce or wateva, he just acts like a ttoally different person
he follows that trend
it really fucken pisses me off
oh well, the thing is, i'll be leaving graduation as a happy man, and some really good friends
i can see alrady, many ppl i'm not even gonna talk to again

and right now, im also quite sad, to the fact theres 5 more days of school left
im gonna miss the class rooms, the teachers, the first day of school, the timeouts/detentions,
everything
ahhhhh

we all need to grow up

g'nite

recapppppp

2008-09-16T18:39:00.000+10:00

satuday.
lol randomest day..
went to franks in the morning, palyed guitar hero, then some real guitar, then yea, went voting with him and his mum.., then went city
funny thing, frank goes to the everywhere intnernet machine, and puts in 10 bux.
and hes like, i thgout itd give change, but no, he bought himself 6 horus and 30 minutes of game time.
LOL
he blew his whole days money
then we went to this jap restraunt. (ryan, jackie, pat, etc)
high tech tot he max.. computer screens to order food
holy shit!

but had 3 chicken wings bcz its was all seafoood.

after that frank left, and i went to meet up with the people from michjeffs party..
went to darling harbour maccas and stayed for while

gotmyself sober before i got home :D

sunday, dads b'day,
we and family friends went for dinner..
thats about it

monday
shit day
school day, which i didnt go any periods
played awhole day of guitar

tuesday
awesome :D

lol played all morning of guitar, and singing with garmon

then it was the "7B" reunion, with like everyone else there
mr melvin shouted us pizzas

we watched year 7 videos
HOLY HSIT!

ahaha , it was hilarious!!,
can't blv i was like that back then, and a few other ppl.
so cute back then

anyway, luincheon tables
muther fuckerS! who arent going
our tables are FUCKED up now because of you fucking idiots
seriously, even mr werner told us.
our year is the most stupidest year he's ever seen
he gets about 5 not going every year
this year he gets more than 11 per roll call class
he calls these people 'idiots'

indeed you are.

anyway looking forward to trivia night tomrorow
gnitez

the last few weeks.... of hs

2008-09-12T20:49:00.000+10:00

been quite enjoyable
can't stop thinking about the end of high school
so many ppl tell me, after high school. life will be fast, and you will miss it, blah blah
and yea makes me wondering
haha i may have been repeating this, but its starting to hit me like crazy

and mr melvin, our FIRST teacher, and the teacher for the class of "7B", has organised a reunion haha!!, of 7B.
MAN thats awesome, hes gonna shout us Pizza, and gonna show us videos of us when we were in year 7, doing our drama performances
honestly, i want to watch it, but dont want to in a way. its gonna be soo kool haha, i cant blv it, i was so pissed when they filmed me, but now, i seem to want to watch it again.

this is gonna be awesome

anyway, yesterday, i did petes HSC performance part, we had this metal band, haha
he got some singer, a second guitarist, jordan smith on drums, me on bass and himself on lead guitar
man it was preh awesome
cranked the amp to full volume and blasted at the judges
its his HSC, and i think its went alrite

today was a fking bludgy day
i swear, we're doing NOTHING at all now at school
ive been jigging nearly every period i have

today, went physics for one period, then after that
i was baiscally palying guitar the whole time, jamming with ryan jackie and jared
then garmon nd chris came..
haha preh awesome, their improvised rap, nd beatboxing
fking beasts
and LOL maths this arvo
4 ppl turned up
i walked past the room and walked off
like who the fucks gonna go now
and that indian teacher, im sorry, i dont understand

oh well

then after we had stage band, preh fun, just playing random jazz/spanish things
then jordan drove me home after,

anyway, im off to sleep now

hmm?

2008-09-09T21:48:00.000+10:00

high school ends in 2 weeks
end of HIGH SCHOOL
oh my god..
thinking back to those old days, etc
we finished our schooling..
first 17 years of our life.

achievement?
maybe.

anyway, just a recap
saturday.. was gonna go UNSW, but it was raining
so i cbfed haha
sunday.., went tutoring early in the morning, then in the arvo, went to school, for the music class
monday - MY MUSIC HSC
i had a 35-40 minute program.., 6 pieces to play.
truthfully, i think i screwed it up.
like the last 10 minutes, i started slipping notes, and missing important notes. and made a few mistakes. fully lost my concentration
but the thing with music, i realised was that. its not like english or maths, you cant get a rubber and rub it out.
you screw up, your gone.
its like a one shot sorta thing
fuck! oh well, its over
that was the worst 40 minutes of my life spend.
then i got home, i forgot my fucking keys!
so walked all the way back to hrustville, then seans house
im so stupid.
wasted atleast another 50 minutes walkinga round

oh well

today, was phre random
everyone jigged maths
so slack to this indian teacher, bcz we ddint understand her.
i think we got put down for truancy, but i think we'd get past it. our whole class was at the basketball courts, except for the 2 people that went

then HSC seminars
"ITS NOT TOO LATE"
repeatedly said.

im pumped again :D
well yea, ill start studying now?

if i do well in this HSC, im done./set!
ahh
gotta start working

went library after school today..
nicole just comes and sits next to me..
and tries to find out this mystery girl that i always talk about
stupid ppl these days

anyway,

fucken thing.. i wanted to go to that stgghs social..
but argh! i got a guitar performance at the opera house that day, and its like
RIGHt next to where they are
omgggg

but ill find a way

besides that, everythings happy :D

g'nitez

neg

2008-09-05T21:46:00.000+10:00

why is my blog always so negative

or am i just looking at shit sides of things
ive had a shit week yet again

oh well

miss carrington, fat tall bitchy lady puts me onto detention for not having my shoes
this was the convo
her: uniform pass?
me: ahh, sorry miss i didnt get one, i came after free period
her: name
me: victor xiong
her: ok go, get out

WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT
she just walks off
if that was was a guy teacher or wateva, i wouldve landed a punch right into his face
since shes a fat bitch, she'd make a huge fucken fuss out of it, like how she does with everyone in the school

anyway yesterday, went city
bought ryan the guitar
his bday gift ahaha
preh kool gift, like so many ppl chipped in nd shit
then we signed it today and gave it to him

preh happy guy

oh and at the city
saw aaron ngan.. from last year
he was on the free hugs campaign! (the original poster, and that guy that on TV that started it was there, met him.. fuk all so kool people!)
anyway it was on pitt street
preh kool haha
caught up with him a bit

HSC music is coming up next monday
fucken gg!

anyway, not good.. with the korean guy whos organising the afterparty
i asekd nicely for a money back.., and yea went a bit far
it got to a point where i asked alot of quesitons and he got sus, then other way around, and going personal with me, saying my friends arent real, why would you want to go to their afterparty and etc..
spend an hour and ahalf tlaking to him
fucken killer
but bottom line, is i dont htink im gettin the money back
personally im preh scared of him too, you know after that knife incident witht aht other guy in our school.., like if i try to get my money back from him, he might stab me or osmething

argh fuk..

oh well

ahh life is so shit atm,

and ryan nd i had a long talk today..
the future.. school ends in 3 weeks
3 WEEKS!
we MUST keep in touch

argh.. i swear 10 years time.. i think we're all gonna go different ways

but yea, try to keep in touch!!

and some people i do not want to see ever again
many people
when i came to think about it, there are people i hang aroudn now, that i think i would not talk to in the future, maybe ever again. we may be stil called 'friends' but yea
after high school
its gone

i cant wait till high school ends
all this shit will be over

its sad but not sad in a way

argh..

but make a promise, that we will keep in touch in the future. high school is an unforgettable experience, and the true friends lie there

its good to blog stuff liek this
i do feel kind of better
sometimes i want to cry..
:'(

anyway, here are some pics

gnite

theres this girl..

2008-09-02T20:38:00.000+10:00

2008-08-29T19:36:00.000+10:00

well shit.

wednesday, me frank and garmon organised our imaginary journey" to europe (eurotrip).
okay, so we were like, ticket, hotels, acoomidation, food, etc.
ALL happy, ALL DONE.
ready to book tickets
FRANK DIDNT COUNT INT HE AIRPORT TAX (when he tried to book it)
1 extra thousand fucking dollars
we spend 3 days organising this
ALL EXCITED
kaboom

i got cut/killed/stabbed/fuck
FUCK seriouisly
now theyre all not going
how stupid.

i was pumped man!!

oh well
my plan, go back to my job
straight after my last exam, lay off for a week or two, and start wokring

guess thats all i can do

china/japan/wherever,
no.

im a sadcase

another thing that made me wonder
we have 3 more weeks of school
after this it sHSC
and after..
are we still gonna know eachotehr?
will friends still be the same?
i reckon soon everythin'll fukl up
i dont know
man so much is oging throguh my head

some people are such dickfucks
let me give you a clue
hes korean, has the name of an actor

gives it away
he just tries too hard.. or he thinks hes some king shit.

like im the type of person that doesnt give a shit what people have got to say..
but he tries everything to make people react, and when i do, he pushes me against the wall and goes, what you say kunt? and tries to start a fight
let me get tell you somethin
you are a fucking tryhard.
do somethign better with your fucking time

fucking idiot i swear

oh well
man everythings so fucked up

especially that holdiay iw as hoping for
now everyones gone, i have no one to go with
its so sad

oh well

when everones on holidays, ill be at home/oncomputer/working/
fucking doing nothing

ok im talking arndom

this isgay

gahh

2008-08-26T21:49:00.000+10:00

well this last week,
after my trials got most of my stuff back
happy / unhappy
but yea, relaxed as hell

saturdaynight was awesome
bbq, drinks, watching ppl getting drunk
(bruce, neon, richrd!!LOL) fuked up sydney boys, pissed everywhere, then ran for our lives, when we realised there was actully ppl in the hall doing a seminar or something
and so yea, apparenty i was quite off too, so i went to RICE at like 9 (10 minutes before it finished)
sat there and concentrated on the speech nd all that, just to try and sober up

didnt work,
caught a taxi to central station, and forgot to pay the taxi driver, got told by that lebonese driver, and yea, preh scared..
cops then came up to me, asked if i was alright, and i was like, yea all good.. they were just like take care, and wlaked away..
but got home, slept, till 7 the enxt morning for tutoring!!
biggest headache
damnit

secondly, music night was on last night
went well , quite enjoyable , and yea
had a few awkward sentences when talking on stage
i guess im not that type of person to talk on front of everyone with a mic.

amyway,

kool week, but sad too

this is really karma..
Ms haitidis' son.. had a seizure, and now has a braintumor or something.., and yea, mr melvin told us that he has low chance of survival, according to experts..
this is so sad.. i cant imagine what shes going through.. its .. argh!!
its something that makes you wonder.. why this happens..
please get well soon and hope everything goes well.

then secondly, this reminds me of 1 litre of tears, but this time im in it..

my cousin/relative, that im preh tight with, recently became weak and energyless.., and how skinny as hell..
they called up sunday morning, and she has contracted some brain disease, and its slowly growing.. recently seeing this, shes having problems walking now, and yea, can't do anything,..

she just got married and now 30 something..
argh, this is so depressing..
she has two children too, like ones 6 and the others like 8..

why does this fucken shit happen..

i never imagined what it'd be like to ever have that happen to someone close to me..
like.. whats gonna happen, when time goes by..
in 20 years time, what will everything be like?
and she was so normal before, we playd ball, ran around, it was all so happy,
and what now?,
shes only 30
theres so much ahead, children to grow up with
i hope she really lasts for much longer, and be stronger for much longer.

so much to live for

this world sucks..

-v

facebook?

2008-08-19T20:15:00.000+10:00

wtf?!?
facebook?!

ahah i seem to be going on it alot
im another one of those ppl now :@

nthing mcuh has been goin on

i got my music marks back, fuck ti was shit.

did speeches today!, went preh good, and very happy :D
out of 5-5:30 minutes, i got 5:29
woohoo!
and i fit everything in, teacher nodded during my speech, so yae :D

well i hope atleast

and no offense, or any sort of thing against you, watching your speech made me so unconfortable, and it was like scary. ,hanning, like holy shit i thoguht u were ognna take out a gun or something. you were shaking and angry. SORRY

anywho,

speeches went well, and i cant blv it, i was playing cs in the morning with quachie, like an hour of cs, before the speech.
Seano and Jlin came over after speeches, preh fun
guitar jammin =P
well now i have two guitars, abhinays one still at hand, wghich i have to return very soon.
so yea ;P

TEST RESULTS BACK SOON
gonna ruin my week, worried shitless.

my HSC for music is gonna be in 2 weeks
can u fking blv it!
how strange, in two weeks, the REAL thing. now how does that work.

anyway off to.. play a few rounds

Okay recap.

2008-08-16T16:05:00.001+10:00

Monday was the english exam!
went well for part 2, and screwed up part 1 and 3, because.. i had no idea what was going on. so yea, bullshitted the whole thing nearly haha. tried to remember soem quotes, nd yea..
then after, me johnny and frank went guitar shop.. and wtf.. 2 hours went by in there.

Tuesday i stayed home doing nothing.. watched a movie, and tried studying music

Wednesday, music exam, very funny. walked into the hall, and it was our music teacher hah, thought it was gonna be an external marker.
So it was very unserious, and even that, i screwed it up.. you had to study essays on the pieces ur playing.. which i had no idea of. Bullshitted again.. after that, went hungrys for lunch.. nd yea.., a day gone by.

Thursday.. we went parramatta (billy hydes guitars).. and Johny and his directions :@
so 40 minutes went by, walking around parramatta looking for "familiar", and places that ring a bell.. and so we went no where.. and thanks to sean on the phone, we were able to get an address
funny that place, other side of sydney, isolated, quiet, i felt like i was in like a coutnryside town.

Friday, watched another movie (Oceans 13). preh kool movie ha. Then went to the guitar store with frank, checked out some amps..

Anyway, today.. i bought the guitar
preh sexy, and i ended up buying myself a marhsall stack
preh stupid but yea :P coudlnt resist
so it was 1.9 down the drain today.. but not really down the drain, i like it
spent 5-6 hours playing today.. my god it sounds so fkkkkkkkkkkkken good

Anyway, off for a rest now

nothing special

2008-08-10T16:51:00.000+10:00

concentrate!! ahhhhh

havent blogged in 2 weeks, so ill recap

i joined FACEBOOK, on the sunday before trials
something stupid to do but i dunno why
hi5 garmon!, who joined the day after me, during the trials

trials are going.. a lil bit below average.. but oh well..
i had a 31 hour day on thursday.. doing my composition for music, which was meant to be like.. 6 and half months worth of work?.. so yea.. no sleep no nothing..
fuken killer

Tomorrow.. im performing at the opera house// fucken freakout!
well 9 of us, our lil jazz band

4000 audience?.. they call it the "full house"
so yea.. fuck me dead

im getting a guitar tomorrow aswell! :D:D:D:D:D
so fking happy and cant wait
Fender - 'Deluxe' Stratocaster Series, 04 model
worth about 2.9 everywhere i looked

anyway im getting it for about 1.85K.
gosh cant wait
its like the best guitar ever/sounding ever
i spent 2 nd a half hours sitting there playing it last friday
so yea
reason its sold cheap is because it is taken out of its original packacing.. and been on display.
and has been played maybe 3 or 4 times.
the condition after examining it from head to bottom, there wasnt a single scratch
but zomg its liek best looking guitar ever too

btw, owns gibsons. :P

anyway im off
i got english tomrorow, and a long fucken day

gggggggggggggggggggggg

!@#$%^&*

2008-07-29T20:53:00.000+10:00

lol long time no blog

well holdiays have been a total bludge. i tried to do work so many times, but never ended up going to it..
i played cs, watch family guy.. went to franks new house at one stage..
and fuk! no work done

and so yea school starts, first week, same shit ahaha
then.. i started thinking about really weird shit..
we got the UAC guide.. then uni started to pop into my head..
after watching all those american movies with people in college, or even going to unsw myself, for a numerous amount of times to do "study" courses there, it seems like such an awesome place..
but ok, ill be happy, well more than happy if i make it.., but right now, i have a feeling i wont make it.. at the rate of procrastination/not doingw ork and all that shit.. its goodbye HSC/UAI/UNI. i dont konw what im gonna think when that letter or text comes in, telling you the UAI or wateva.. [Sorry Victor, you have not made it into the following Uni: - - - - ]
like.. everyone is so smooth, they get their 80's or 90's in their subjects, have a lil stress, go on with their courses, go to school, study, play games, all balanced. get their uai, go into uni, finish uni, GRADUATE, find a fucken good job, ARGH!
but yea, i thoguht about that, if i dont make it into uni.. ill lose all my friends?, like.. i still want to be with most of them, or atleast a few of them, so we can still hang out or wateva during uni, and make friends at uni, .. they seem like such nice people..
i dont want to end up in TAFE.. bunch of hsc failers, well no offence, but its just so different to those people at uni.
uni is a place i dream of going..
walking up those classy steps, into the lecture halls, with professers teaching nd all that..
but.... argh..
i guess its my own fault for not trying hard enoguh..
right now i just feel like..
id ont know...... my head is spinning
i jsut want this HSC trials shit over and done with, then the hsc.
i want to escape........
oh and on top of that, mr conner walks up to me.. hey victor, you know your phyisics ranking?, ur 81st/83 int he year

you gotta try harder.
so i nod, and he goes on with the lesson

and ye.. then i agreed to do accompanyment next week for jordan and pete, like playing sax and doing bass guitar for THEIR hsc. and i havent even got mine under way yet. theres this compulsary "enesemble" piece.
and so i find one, put together in about 2 and a half weeks, which was meant to be atleast a years work.

so yea..

parents a bit worried about me too, but oh well..
i hope i do come out as some sucess someway.. dont care wat.. music/busness/I.T..
not someone who lives at home with his parents, till 30 and have a shitty airport job.

argh... its so depressing

on a lighter side, this is what me and frank did in the holdiays
jay chou - simple love [cover]

empty

2008-07-09T23:00:00.000+10:00

still the same!
im going crazy

except today.. i orgniased my music hsc, which involves a fuckload of work!
6 songs, 1 whole composition, and 1 test, written, with analisyed stuff
fuck!
and yea, i went to my piano teacher today, wasnt very happy.
i actaully walked there today.. took about 35 minutes
hurstville to kingsgrove
ahaha
then went to seans place.. when the bus randomly passed his place wtf haha

and yea.. that was a highlight of the day

i spent my last 2 and a half hours tabbing guitar songs

anyway im out
gnitez

what?

2008-07-08T16:41:00.000+10:00

nothing special

i feel like shit. trials coming up. fucken screwed.
last chance to get a decent UAI
oh well..
parents worried shitless about me now, i can tell :(
always checking on me
but argh

i will try
past few days i havent done any work,

grrrrr

b-o-r-e-d

2008-07-06T20:15:00.000+10:00

should be bored but yes.

i cant be fuggered studying..
the past two days ive been playing games, surfing net, chatting.. what the fuck!
only work i did was this morning, at tutoring,

went franks today.. swapped guitars ahaha

but omg.. everyones studying
makes me worried now, but .. im doing nothign about it
im an idiot

trials in 28 days? i think
god damn.

bitch

2008-07-04T22:13:00.000+10:00

holidays!

funny, me and sean did something so shifty in the music room
we emptied our bags and put the guitar amps in, then took the bass guitar and ran for our lives

but yes, we made it out of the school all fine
and will return it after the holidays lol!

so we ended up goign seans house
and while walking back to school something scary hapepned
we look back
a wall of rain comes
no joke, it was rain coming like a wall, dry on front of us,
so we decided to run like hell..
rain stopped in 10 minutes

like fuck! we were soaked
and walked into english 20 minutes late.. funny

got our trial assesments today
oh goddddddddddddddddd

after that frank miao came over.. played some guitar and yea.. left, as i needed to go tutoring

preh random day

i hope to study for trials, as it is coming near
have been playing too much half life 2

dang.

anyway. outs

interesting days..

2008-07-02T22:09:00.000+10:00

well yes, yesterday was interesting, did nothing at all at school
jigged first with desmond, went rehersal second and jigged third with desmond again..
surprising, its desmond, and he jigs
ahaha how ironic
so yea.. it was music night that day, so alot of shit was going on,
played bass and drums with sean for a lil while before i went home... to play games [half life - lost coast - maddest graphics], for 3 hours.. wat a geek
gosh
and yea i practiced 20 minutes of piano, for the night

and yes, the 20 minutes paid off as i screwed up on front of the 400 people watching, not just saying screwed up, i started playing random keys and it sounded like .. some random guy hitting random notes on the piano, and so i stopped for like a second, and skipped a whole section of it. and i blame not having music on the stage... and so i blame my self too

but wat the fuck, no one picked up that mistake except for my parents and desmond

and so yes, my night was all bright again.
ms blake, rielly, mr mcnaught and like 5 other teachers that were there were like, omg great performance, that was awesome, blah blah,

and what pissed me off was ms blake, walking up to my parents, going, oh yea.. you should be proud, and she starts talking to me going she never knew i was "that" good, she thought i played piano as some sort of shit to kill time or something. i mean.. wtf, im some lowlife dropkick who did nothing with my life?.. for 6 years shes been lecturing me about my studies, and now shes like wow!, he knows something!
maybe my explanantion isnt good, but she pissed me off.

anyway yes, it was an interesting day indeed.

then today.. didnt even bring a bag to school.. 1 period of music and im off.
how random.
spend the first free period with roman.. playing piano?, killed a whole hour..
and yea.. music, went jamming with the teacher? and jordan on the drums.. wat a good music period to spend, shouldntve even come.

then yea, our class got a letter from mr towner, how nice. preh sad but yea..
then went home and played a few hours of half life again.. !
im preh screwed at the rate im going :(

so then tonight, i started doing my work, until this man started screaming on the middle of the road. 3 police came, and arrested him o.0.. handcuffed and put into this box/van police car.. and they had torches searching all over the place for something.. no idea wat..
but yea, i was just sitting there watching for about 40 minutes,
its like watching a real crime show, "csi" or something, but this was interesting.
like i think they mightve found like a dead body in the car or something o.o.. (jks)

killed my day

out.

gnite

lol

2008-06-30T18:59:00.000+10:00

and so on.

we got our english back.. 7/15! ahaha laughed my head off when i got it.. now i see how easy some teachers mark..
i expected 2 or 3

second period.. played drums nd guitar with johnny.. preh good time killa.. and yea..

third went music.. mr gamage and his drumming! ahah we were jammin

then fourth.. skipped maths bcz i had a rehersal
yes.. wat a random day its been

and at lunch today, in the VA room.. theres a certain fucker, who is a tryhard, korean, and says "fuck" every 3 words, and yes.. so i decided to imitate him
"fuck fuck this fuck that omg fuck fucken fuck fuck."
he stands up and goes.. you better shut the fuck up..

and i was like.. wat are you gonna do, and he whispers mutha fucker, and sits back down..
wat a lil shithead.. like what sort of normal person says the f word, every single sentence, and tries to start shit when he couldnt even hurt a fly.. not saying that i can beat him or anything.. im weak as shit, but srsly..
pulls out a deck of smokes and starts smoking, swearing, sleeves rollled up, acting all hard.. like fuck..
these people need to fucken learn

yea.. and hope they get bashed up and learn a lesson one day.
i wouldve walked overtoday and punched the shit out of him.. but i held myself, or maybe waited till he walked over.

yea.. that kinda bugged me today.
like.. compare someone liek that, a tryhard lil shithead, to someone happy and calm like bailey or someone..

its really weird..
even to think why they choose to be that way, like what the hell.

and on a brighter side i got myself a new hardrive! 320 gig.. well mainly becuase i only have 300 megs left.. dang hah :D

anyway off to do some school work 8-)

okay

2008-06-29T19:43:00.000+10:00

well.. i had tutoring in the morning at 8.. woke up at 7.30.. gosh it was terrible! as he went through my maths paper lol!
so yea. that killed my day.

anyway i got home.. started playing gta san andreas.. and yea killed a few hours..

okey, then mr owens calls up, telling me to perform on a music night on tuesday.. and i was like.. okay w/e.. fully random

then jlin came over in the arvo.. hung round for a lil while and went.

and basically.. i didnt get ANY work done today! omg :(

and just somethign that has bugged me this whole day..
the formal, am i going or not, do i have a date or not, and especially with the payment dates end of this week! im fking stressed.. goddangit

catching up 3 days work is scary for me! i hope i havent missed much.. preh stressing

and another stressful thing is tuesday night.. a performance unprepared.. and walking onto a stage on front of 600 people............. fekkkkkkkk, but yes.. i have to cram like usual. but what will people think of me :S

ima sleep now, nite

bak from camp

2008-06-28T19:30:00.000+10:00

wat a 3 days its been

took 3 days off school to go to music camp (band camp) but i dont like to call it that now because of certain stereo types.

left early wednesday morning.. and got there 3 hours later because of a stupid traffic jam..

and yea..

it was preh boring in fact.. but it was alright to get away from school for 3 days.. and that really worried me in a way..

3 days of school work i missed.. but.. its good in a way :)

so yea.. i was in the room with jordan, matday and jared..

and and and, this one time at band camp i ________________________

make up something urself

anyway.. nothign went my way.. i had an electric guitar in my room.. but then it broke.. as in the switch and sound wire broke.. then it didnt work.. and i shouldve brought my own.. then i was like Fuck!.. then at practice, i became sick.. because of :S i dunno.. maybe bcz mr gammagay was sick.. but yea.. that was shit.. then played poker at night.. lost 1 dollar . fuck!
then yea everythign was fukedd.. my sleeping bag at night was cold .. like a fridge.. preh fucked

food was good.. and everythign was good.. i didnt go to any activities though.. haha=]

and as year 12's we didnt need to line up or anything for dinner.. so it was all kooll

got back home and had tutoring at 5!
so then yea i was tired and went to sleep at 630

wat a 3 days its been

and now saturday.. i spent the whole day.. playing comptuer and watching tv.. omggggggg

anyway looking forward to school.. again on monday

trials in 6 weeks

goodnite

same

2008-06-24T20:10:00.000+10:00

meh

morning went to school at like 10.. missed the seminars!

anyway we got our maths marks! and i failed by 1 mark.. fuck! 27/56
wtf!! i tried all lesson trying to find 1 mark

anyway, today it was alrite, we had a profressional music guy come in for music today, helped us alot!, preh happy.. and then at lunch, played a bit of guitar with seano in the hall..
preh fun

then went hurstii library.. studied for like half n hour lol!.. and didnt manage to get anything in :(

then saw roger at hrustii.. caught up with him bcz havent talked to him in ages!

lol!

and then derek quan! wooooot.. 2 years no see.. so we caught up a bit too.. and met some of his fortstreet friends..

and yea.. that was the main highlight for the day

went home.. on computer,

and CAMP tomorow:D

packing now. toodles

yay!.. not

2008-06-23T21:21:00.000+10:00

well.. shit day i guess..

played a morning of basketball .. and warmed me up for the rest of the day =].. so first we had english .. boring shit.. doing some play :(..

then i had a free.. and yea..played drums and visited the VA room where pat monir and ryan were doing art 0.o

yea.. then third period fucked everything up.. for the rest of the day..
got our tests back!

and i got.................
12/30..
wat a surprise eh..

fuck.

fuck fuck fuck.

anyway.. after that period.. i had a free last.. so i played a bit of guitar and bass with sean.. then went home..

preh shit..........

next test back is maths..

god.

going to sleep now

The .. Week.

2008-06-22T11:17:00.000+10:00

what week its been

tests!

anyway monday we did english .. and fuck! lol.. they set a poem to study.. not we get to pick one.. so yea.. they set one i DIDNT study
made up so much bullshit.. like.. the title of the poem was french, which meant something (forgot what i made up)

then went jlins house for like a few hours..

but yea.. then we had music performances.. went well.
and rofl! we had a year meeting, theyre gonna cancel our formal and jerseys if we dont pay up! ahahaha

so yea.. that was the main highlight of the day.. rest of the day.. i studied o.0 or maybe read like 5 words.. with ushan monir and alison...

went home and yea! my relatives left! so the house is more emptier.. and ppl can come over now :D

tuesday..... no test!
spent the whole fucking day doing the music "composition"..... and yea.. it was meant to be a "months" work.. or even longer.. so yea .. made it up in about 8 hours, wrote some notes, and yea.. ready fro wednesday.

wednesday we had the english collage due.. and yea.. i finished taht on saturday.. we had a 20 minute written test on it, and fuck yea!!! i think i went awesome in it!, i wrote even more than what i did in that test on monday lol!

and yea.. i then bummed at jlins place and his mum cooked me lunch! :D
so yea.. bummed until the music thingo.. and it went so well..... i managed to fool the teacher!
gahahahahah

anyway.. after.. seano came over and bummed for a bit

after that i was meant to study but lol! i played games till like 9 .. even thoguh i had tests netx day

so yea.. i crammed about 30 minutes and went to sleep

thursday.. i had maths and physics

gosh.. maths i went okay in.. but i still think i failed ahah! dammit

then physics.. i actualyl wrote something in the test for once!! rofl
understood alot of it :D
but still think i failed

friday.. whole day off!! :D

stayed home all day.. and umm kenny woke me up and came over in the morning.. nd then they all went to aquatic or something?.. i cbfed goin so yea..

played games.. then in the arvo, sean came over.. play some guitar and went haha

satuday.. stayed home with family.. then went shopping at hurstivlle.. randomness.. got my self a hair cut and .. went shopping.. then saw jeff and his gf in coles.. and i was like wtf aha.. and then matt au popped up.. and i was like wat the fuck again

so yea.. random

then family friends came over.. and i stayed in the room playing halo! .

sunday.. had tutoring in the morning! fuck had to wake up at 7.30.... and anyway..

sitting here right now.. bottle of beer and playing GTA...

preh good waste of time.

wat a week its been..

and i got music CAMP ON Wednesday!! WOOHOO

great time to chill off..

i am looking forward to the upcoming

and something ken brought up made me wonder..

wat happens after hsc? when we all finish .. go uni, or get a job or wateva.. like is everything going to change?.. like we might not even talk to eachother after hsc..

and after hsc.. were all gonna be bored haha..

but anyway.. somethign to think about

toodles

DumDiddlyDum

2008-06-15T20:35:00.000+10:00

So yea.. i had tutoring at 8 this morning, woke up at 7.. haha it was so hard! so i got up at 7.45.. and was late to tutoring

Basically today.. it was that, then i did my physics assignment all day, and played piano..
ENGLISH Exam tomrorow! and i havent read a thing.. bcz i was worreid about physics
LOL!

anyway.. exams tomorrow.. oh dang =[

and my relatives are leaving for mainland now.. so yea.. im free again! i guess

toodles

2008-06-14T22:30:00.000+10:00

Dear blog,
Well, I atleast did something today.., I finished my english collage, practiced piano for my Monday performance exam, and.. read through some of my english stuff. I felt like I achieved something today! woohoo.

Yea. So basically today was a bit of work, and yea.. a bit of bludging too.

OH and HAHA "Ritchie Rich".. that movie was on today.. watched it haha! awesome movie

anyway

off to sleep now, have an early morning tutoring lesson tomrrow at 8 =.=

Title:

2008-06-13T15:38:00.000+10:00

Worst morning ever...... woke up at 7.. and had to get to school at 7.30 for a music class doing nothing !

so yea.. i played a bit of guitar.. then.. yea.. first period it was music again.. the teacher was playing guitar all lesson.. and jordan on the drums.. then paul on the piano.. fucking noisy shit.. so i got a headache form that

and then.. we had dkk (inside thing)

after..... i had a free.. and was int he VA room playing with steves laptop..

then after i had physics!, where the teacher approved my work for the first time! woohoo!

so yea.. then finished school.. playd basketball with sean, jlin and sabiq.. was quite fun :D owned sesan and jlin hard ;)

anyway,.. it was fun today.

now i have to go tutoring =\

toodles.

4 Days left!

2008-06-12T19:00:00.000+10:00

and............................

school.. morning - music!
we did.. the past papers .. and singing! .. omg that was funny

then a free period.. studied at the library! woohoo.
was wtih jason upstairs

then maths.. ahah didnt concentrate.. so i didnt end up doing a single querstion..

english... did the play.. and yea! spend 3 quaters of the period bludging.. bcz ms haitidus.. went offtopic and started talking bout everything....

THEn after school i went hurstville library.. omg it was so full!
so yea... studied and studied.. for 4 horus then got home.. and now im here again

gnites

titles are hard to think of..

2008-06-11T18:42:00.000+10:00

today...

jigged first period.. maths i cbfed..

then had physics.. and then englihs..

and we had an extended day!

and yea.. omg i paid for my jersey today.. $82.00

fuck! so xpensive.. on top of that
Music Camp - $250
Formal - $115 x2
Yearbook - $100? i dunno..
Afterparty - $35 x2
Phantom Excursion - $60

parents making me pay.. some.. but like.. fuck off? i got no money now

got home now.. havent opened a single book
exam timetables were handed out.. fucking scary

oh dear!

chatting on msn atm. fuck!

out

omg......

2008-06-10T16:09:00.000+10:00

im so damn screwed!

yesterday - monday, whole day off and i was meant to study.. but..................................

yes.. i didnt open a single book or read a single word.. maybe a few words on youtube.. thats about it..

havent started anything.. collage, studying, music comps, and its all due next week!

anyway, today.. school.. long day.. had maths first then music. our teacher was away.. so we.. played games all period?

then had early day.. home at 1:10.. but yes.. all the way till now.. still no study

someone needs to hit me in the head before i do anything

anyway.

out

hmm..

2008-06-08T22:50:00.000+10:00

Last day at work!... gosh its sad
so many nice people... so many good lucks.. hugs.. nd.. omg =[ its so sad leaving..

so yea..

i should be studying!! i havent opened a book since.. friday afternoon.

gnites

X

2008-06-07T21:17:00.000+10:00

I have been inspired .. once again .. to create a blog.. maybe by Garmons blog

Anyway.. it seems blogging is something that you can let your anger, your sadness or your feelings out..

Well.. recently alot of things have been digging into my head.. creating shitness of everything. I just resigned my job.. which i dont think i will ever get again, really sad.. And for wat.. i dont fucking know.. it should have been my choice.. but its the pressure of my parents. and maybe my hsc, which to tell the truth i do not give a fucking shit about. Really.. i am going to school to wat.. see friends?or make my parents happy? not to dissapoint them?

Yes.. about school.. Since the start of year 12 everything started fucking up. reports, friends, life, and everything!.. i got 52 for english, 77 for maths, 45 for physics, 63 for music and 95 for music ext. and you know what im ranked?.. 6th last in the year.. out of 160 people?.. i am known to be a "dropkick" now.. which you fuckers say.. and you know what? i dont give a shit..
right now i have this thing stuck in my head with my parents.. I am VERY worried about dissapointing my parents with my outcome of the hsc.. i personally dont care, but my parents.. i dont want them to think i was raised a dumbshit and they both become emo or someshit. They don't think im going as bad as it is.. this stresses me out everyday.. What are they going to do after my hsc when they see my outcome? will they kick me out?, wish i never existed? i dunno..

i give up.

About a month ago, i had thoguht of running away from home, runnign away for like 20 years.. get something done with my life, or join the army or omsething, be someone new, forget all the past.. but i dont see that happening.

that brings me to friends at school.. everythings changed.. some people have just drifted off.. as that i mean.. really really close friends.. like.. it goes to the extent where we walk past eachother and we dont say hi or anything to eachother.. I dont exist in their world anymore.. I remember back in year 9 and year 10, we use to hang aroudn everyday, play basketball after school, go to all these restarants after school everyday.. is it me or what.. thats caused this change? why is it me.. am i different person now?, am i a dickhead?.. my personality?.. i got too many questions.. but it will be stuck in my head for the rest of my life.
What i also realised is some close friends act differnetly upon differnent people.. like.. if i talked to him the day bfore, all kool nd shit, then the next day at school hes with another group of people, he'll join nd act like them.

And many other people are just fuckers.. plain fuckers.. which i cannot name.. you guys need to grow up.. grow a fucking brain. this world does not 'revolve' around YOU.. you dont just tell someone to 'move your fucking seat', or 'move ur fucking stuff'.. what the fuck is wrong with you seriously..

Somedays i have daydreams.. wanting to smash the shit out of them.. or atleast throw a punch into their face to shut their foul fucking mouthes up..
i am warning now.. i will SNAP one day.

I havent been down to the basketball courts for the past month or so.. really.. its shit down there now.. people down in the passive area are much friendlier.. everyones cool with eachother, its like a family there. The basketball courts.. well there are some cool people but most are just fuckers.., they think theyre some top shit. And really.. all i see is people swearing at eachother.. It just doesnt work down there for me..

Why can't everything be what it use to be.. year 7.. or even like year 1 or wateva.. the joys of running around.. playing soccer or climbing mokey bars or wateva.. look at now.. everything has changed.. i dont see myself in this world now. mainly because of how friends are treating me now days.. and school work..

so yea.. now.. i sit here.. confused.. dont know whats happening.. what my future will be.. what my future firends will be.. and what i will be like in 20 years time.

I also wonder, what it would have been like if i started hanging with a different group of people from year 7... Would i be someone different?, would i be where i am now?
these mysteries..

good night,

X